as a man thinketh ...

Improving Your Life For Free

2007-12-15T22:17:00.001+08:00

By Bradley Marks

You can spend a fortune looking for ways to increase the quality of your life. You can cut a big check to a plastic surgeon. You can build a new wing on your house. You can try to impress the guys at the club with your new Rolex.

Those who are looking for a slightly less garish way to get the job done can still drop big money in hopes of a little self-improvement. You see folks who eschew the consumer path to a happier life sinking their resources into guides, gurus and seminars.

Here's the deal, folks. You can start improving your life right now without spending a dime. There are plenty of free things you can do to start making life a little better. Let's look at few of them:

Smile. Smiles are free. And they have this strange ability to put you in a better mood. That's true if you're looking at them, but it's also true if you're flashing one. It's as if your mind will start to adjust to comport with your expression. Smile more.

Sleep. Nothing can drag down the quality of life quite the way sleep deprivation can. If you're not getting enough sleep, you need to make adjustments as soon as possible. You'll experience a huge upgrade in the quality of your life once you've paid off your sleep deficit.

Senses. We all have a series of senses. Appreciate them. Think about them as you use them. Enjoy the taste of the mustard (or mayo, for that matter) on your sandwich. Appreciate the beauty of vivid colors. Notice the way the wind really feels on face as you walk outside. Experience your senses. Don't just let them "run in the background". You'll feel more alive when you do.

Sunlight. Get outside. The body likes it. In fact, it needs it. You don't need to roast yourself to a crisp on the beach, just get a little sunlight every day. Make a point of it. You'll start to notice a difference, especially if you approach that outdoor time with the aforementioned sensory mindfulness.

Those are just four examples of the free ways you can start improving your life immediately. And they're just the tip of a very big iceberg. There's nothing inherently wrong about spending a few bucks to learn something new and potentially powerful. Just remember that there are a few ways to make a difference on the cheap, too.

Are you ready to learn more about improving your life? There is a wealth of insight and perspective available. We are talking about potentially life-changing information!

If you are ready to get started, I wholeheartedly recommend that you look at this site. I know you will be glad you did:

http://claritytoconfidence.com/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Bradley_Marks

The Prerequisites for Becoming a Life Coach

2007-11-15T18:12:00.001+08:00

If we really want to help people regardless of our credentials whether as a psychologist, counselor, life coach, doctor or friend we will need to as much as possible embody the following (we are using the word subject in the place of the words patient or client):

1. Care for the other and sincerely desire to help him or her. The subject will feel if we really care or not.

2. Accept whatever we hear and have an open mind. We must be able to hear that the other has murdered someone without judging him. The degree to which the other can open himself is dependent on how accepting he perceives us.

3. See what others call evil as weakness and ignorance and fear rather than as evil. Ignorance and misinterpretation of our true nature leads to a wide variety of ego-centered and often destructive behaviors.

4. Study and understand the functioning of the mind by observing ourselves and others and by studying what already has been discovered by the sciences of psychology, sociology, philosophy and religion.

5. Keep clearly in mind that our work is to reconnect him/her with inner strength and guidance, not make him/her dependent on us.

6. Be open to the unique ways in which each individual grows and heals himself. Do not be so caught up in systems or labels or specific procedures or in what you know, so that you cannot respond to this unique individual in his/her own specific way.

7. Employ only the techniques that you yourself have experienced a number of times. Only then can you really understand this technique and know when to use it and how to handle any crises which may be provoked by it.

8. Practice what you teach. Although this role does not allow us to teach, we occasionally do so through our behavior or attitudes, or by making suggestions or expressing perceptions or life philosophies. We, ourselves should live these ideals that we are expressing.

9. Be simple, honest, humble and admit when you do not know the answer, or feel confused or cannot help.

10. Be ready to give time and energy even without payment when necessary. Supporting another human being who is in need is not a product to be sold.

11. Learn to be sensitive as to when to push the subject towards discovering or breaking through and when to give him space to prepare himself/herself, or live in his/her illusory security. This sensitivity must also be learned in relationship to our own personal process.

12. Keep up your own evolutionary self-knowledge process in ways which suit you.

13. Become very proficient in active listening as this is the backbone of this whole system.

14. Know all the techniques well, or do not use them.

15. Refer the client to others when you cannot help, either because you do not have enough time to help properly, or you cannot be objective with this person, or when the problem is beyond your ability to help.

16. Never interfere in the persons private life, suggesting that he/she should get divorced or leave his/her family or get an abortion. Just support him/her in choosing from his/her own options, without projecting your own needs or feelings.

17. Keep total confidentiality - secrecy concerning whatever others share with you.

18. Those who are spiritually oriented may want to pray for guidance in every word and action, so that our every move shall be for the others benefit and not for our affirmation or security.

Perhaps you would like to add other prerequisites that come to your mind and send them to us.

Robert E. Najemy, author of 25 books and life coach with 30 years of experience, has trained over 300 life coaches and now does so over the Internet. Become a life coach. Over 600 free article and lectures at www.HolisticHarmony.com/

Don't Be A Perfectionist

2007-11-12T20:38:00.000+08:00

Dont Be A Perfectionist
by Allison Whitehead

We all want to be successful in our chosen career, especially if this involves a business we have set up ourselves.

Working for yourself can easily mean an increased workload the word delegation is not part of your vocabulary if you are self-employed and on your own. It is natural, therefore, to push yourself to (and beyond) the limits to satisfy your customers, meet new orders and get each job finished on time and to the highest standard.

However, there is a big difference between wanting to succeed and do well in business, and becoming obsessed with total perfection. Nobody likes to fail, but when a healthy dislike of failure becomes an all-consuming fear, you and your business are likely to suffer as a result.

Due to these perfectionist tendencies, there are many people who are not as successful in business as they might otherwise be and it is all due to their frame of mind.

So how can you avoid becoming a perfectionist?

One of the most important things to remember is how to spot the early signs which could mean you are setting your sights much too high for anyone to reach.

Allow me to give you a personal example. When I first started to write, I used to get very depressed and self critical when a piece of work was rejected. I felt as if the rejection was a personal one as if the person who returned my work had actually told me I wasnt good enough, rather than just my work. Sometimes it would be weeks before I could pick up a pen again, so strong was the fear of failure.

Eventually I came to realise I was failing myself. Nobody likes to be rejected in work or otherwise yet continually playing safe leads to a stagnant life and dwindling opportunities for success and advancement.

Once I had found new determination, I began to see my rejections as part of the learning process, rather than seeing them as failures. They were part of the journey towards my goal of being published regularly, and as such were hugely important. In time, acceptances began to outnumber rejections, and I became more confident in my work. I had changed my focus, and as soon as I stopped being hard on myself and focused on my end goal, rather than on each stumble I made along the way, I got better at what I was doing. My frame of mind changed when I stopped trying to attain perfection, and I started to analyse my rejections to improve my work the next time round.

Some people have perfectionist tendencies in them by nature, yet they can easily develop in any of us. This is especially true if you are in the early stages of setting up your own business. In this situation, it is quite likely that you will have invested money in your new venture. You will want to make sure your money works for you in establishing your own business.

It makes sense to want to produce the best work possible, yet you should always be aware of when to stop. This is the essential difference between the person who achieves success and the person who does not.

Lets say, for example, that you are in the business of making furniture. In that case, you could have a checklist of all the points and stages which need to be fulfilled and completed before the item of furniture can be considered finished.

Once you have ticked off every item, the work is finished. Full stop. No arguing. You have to be firm with yourself.

The person who is always obsessed with trying to attain that unattainable point of perfection will continue with every job they work on, thinking that if they could spend just a little bit longer on this part or that part, they would improve the work still further. Rejection and failure lead to fewer results, fewer earnings, and missed deadlines spelling disaster for the business in question.

By breaking down a job into manageable portions, you can help to avoid what may otherwise be a daunting task. When you tackle a large project in several bite sized portions, you will be much less likely to slip into the role of the perfectionist.

This method of tackling the onset of perfectionism will also build your confidence, no matter whether your business has just started out, or has been up and running for several years. When you are able to satisfy your customers with a job well done, you will be able to say to yourself, Hey, I did a good job there. I know Im capable of doing that again. Maybe I will try branching out into another area to see how I do

And you will be setting more goals for yourself, broken down into stages, to keep your creativity and enthusiasm fresh without veering towards perfectionism in everything you do.

The successful person has more confidence in their own ability to get the job done adequately. The perfectionist, with their need to get everything done just right (and with their eye on the perfect end product, rather than breaking the job down into realistic and manageable stages), never finishes the job at all.

So what happens when things do go wrong?

Well, it doesnt mean you are a failure. We all make errors now and then and yes, sometimes they are whoppers. It can be easy to become lax in your work if you have had a good streak of success. And to prove it can happen to the best of us, I shall admit to a personal catastrophe which taught me a well earned lesson.

A few years ago, I was enjoying a particularly good run of acceptances in my work. I was breaking into many new markets and making connections which I was sure I could capitalise on, if I worked at it.

Still happy with my successes, I set about writing an article for a market which I had been contributing successfully to for quite some time. I dashed something off and sent it out the next day, still wallowing in my run of successes. It was one of those days where nothing can go wrong, no matter what you do.

But it did. My effort was (deservedly) returned with a rejection slip, and I realised how easy it can be to let your efforts slide.

Fortunately, I learned my lesson from this error. This is another important difference between the perfectionist and the person who simply wants to do their best.

The way to avoid looking on every error as a major disaster is to analyse what went wrong, and why it happened. Once you know the answers to these questions, you will be able to make sure the errors never occur again.

In this way it is possible to turn every bad event into a positive one, by discovering what can be learned from it in order to do better in the future.

There comes a time when you have to finish a piece and move on to something new. If you are one of those people who find this hard to do, you could be asking too much of yourself. Know when to let go, and your success rate will improve.

If you recognise yourself as a perfectionist, write the following proverb on a piece of paper and tack it above your desk: Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

It worked for me, and it can work for you too.

About the author:

Allison Whitehead has written and published many articles on positive thinking, goal setting, and personal improvement issues. Her latest book, The 5 Secrets of Successful Goal Setting, is now available. Download your FREE PDF preview from www.lulu.com/content/301705

How To Recognize Alcoholism

2007-11-09T18:03:00.000+08:00

Alcoholism is a devastating disease that effects millions of people every year. Recognizing alcoholism in yourself or someone else can be difficult. Alcoholism is defined as a disease that allows a persons use of alcohol to interfere with their life and the basic functioning of their daily tasks, needs and responsibilities.

The clinical way of looking at alcohol is by examining the amount of alcohol a person consumes. A women who drinks more than seven drink per week or more than three drinks a day and a man who drinks more than 14 drinks per week or four drinks in a day would be considered an alcoholic. A drink is defined as 12 ounces of beer, 5 ounces of wine or 1.5 ounces of 80 proof liquor.

Warning signs of alcoholism may vary form person to person. Usually though these warning signs will be obvious. The following list outlines some of these signs.

- misses a lot of work or school
- losses interest in family, friends or activities
- depression
- drinking to cope with any problem
- insomnia
- being intoxicated often
- moody
- drinking related health problems

These are some of the noticeable warning signs. More serious behaviors can also serve as a wake-up call. Risky behavior like drinking and driving should be taken seriously.

Alcohol when taken in moderation is a nice way to relax or enjoy a social engagement, where when alcohol becomes a problem it can effect everyone who is close to the alcoholic. Some things that can tell a person they may be having a problem with alcohol are:

- worry over not having alcohol or money to buy it
- hiding alcohol so others do not know you have it
- often wishing to be drunk or get drunk faster
- unable to stop drinking once started
- hearing others comment on your drinking

Alcoholism should always be taken seriously. If you or someone you know has a drinking problem professional help is available in every community. Recognizing the problem is the first step to finding a solution.

Be A Visionary Thinker And Not An Idle Dreamer

2007-11-06T17:32:00.000+08:00

Self motivation is something many of us find hard. We know what we want but we just can't seem to get motivated to do anything about getting it. But, if you're going to get to where you want to get to, you need to be a visionary thinker and not an idle dreamer.

Too many people dream of the life they want but are unable to be any plan of action into getting that life. We all dream. Dreaming is the easy part. But how to change a dream into a vision - a vision that will propel us in to that life?

Many successful people have the ability to role-play the life they want. They may not be where they want to be, but that doesn't stop them from acting out the life they want; the life they know, one day, they'll have. The ability to do this is important. Many of us are rational thinkers, and know that we could make every aspect of our 'dreams' come true, but we take absolutely no action towards making any of them likely to happen.

We can all learn a lesson from watching children. All children learn about themselves and the life they're going to live through play. They simply play at being the person they want to be; a doctor, a teacher, a scientist, a mother. They use props around them to act out the life they going to have. They will show everyone one around them, the husband they going to marry, the car they're going to have, the new worlds they'll be the first to discover. I'm not suggesting that we all revert to playing like children, however role playing and vocalising our future will helps us. But why does acting out our dreams make an impact on our motivation?

Firstly, it helps us to feel some of the pleasure and enjoyment which the realization of our dreams will bring. It has been shown, time and again, that we are much more likely to achieve goals which trigger strong emotions in us.

Secondly, role playing implants unforgettably inspiring, vivid images in our subconscious. Even imaginary seeing is believing.

By expressing your vision, you turn your daydreaming of mixed up, meandering and unconnected images into lifelike, linked and solid visions. Your visions will be lifelike, linked and consistent; more like a believable documentary than a whimsical fairytale. The more you believe in your goals the more likely they are achieved. You can use the picture power of your imagination to fix a vivid, detailed, inspiring image of your desired future in your subconscious mind.

We can also use our visionary thinking from the past to help motivate us for the future. We can use the wisdom we have gained from our life and re-apply and re-kindle the dreams of our childhood and youth. Don't be afraid to recollect those grandiose dreams. By honestly re-experiencing the dreams and aspirations of our earlier life, we can confirm that those dreams of yesteryear are, at heart, the dreams we carry in our heart today. But now we can use our experience to find an acceptable compromise.

Robin O'Brien is founder of a website and who is pursuing a journey inner self discovery. You can visit his site to read many more self improvement articles.

Does the Law of Attraction Work?

2007-11-03T17:47:00.000+08:00

For all your failings, and despite your many mistakes, life has picked you; it has believed in you, and it has given you a human body to explore its vast regions.

Using your will, you have sought to change the surface of your world, and time and again, you have felt despair and frustration when what you hoped to manifest either did not appear or appeared somehow diminished when it finally did show up.

Does the Law of Attraction not work?

Does it work for some and not others?

Does it work some of the time and not at other times?

Can you really create your own reality?

Let me explain.

But, first, we must understand the concept of wholeness.

The literature on this subject is exhaustiveranging from obscure references in sacred texts to the findings of physicistsconsciousness is inextricably connected with the whole and cannot be separated into parts.

The entire notion of separation is an abstraction only. For anything to exist at all, be it as obscure as a dust particle, the whole of causation is necessary.

Even the idea of an objective reality, long a tenet of science, has now been refuted by quantum mechanics.

A subatomic element can either be a particle or a wave, depending on how the experiment is measured.

In other words, the conscious intention of the observer determines what is observed.

What has this got to do with the Law of Attraction?

Pretty much everything.

You, the observer of reality, influence the quantum field, with every thought and feeling that you have.

You are always manifesting, whether you like it or not.

Most often, however, you are manifesting what you dont want and then blame it on the Law of Attraction for failing.

See, in order to change any aspect of your reality, whether it is a condition of aloneness, poverty, or illness, you have to change WHO YOU ARE and not WHAT YOU WANT.

When you are in a state of want, your vibrations are that of lack, regardless of what you may be visualizing or affirming.

Consequently, your realization comes back to you void or stripped down to a pathetic version of what you truly desired.

Thus, for example, if you are poor and need a job, and you affirm and visualize diligently, your underlying sense of lack may either give you nothing or it will give you a job that is totally unsatisfying to you.

Why does this happen?

It is because you are not vibrating your desires in a clear way.

Your emotional current, regardless of what your mind is projecting, is holding on to lack, limitation, scarcity, and negativity.

When you change WHO YOU ARE you will start getting WHAT YOU WANT.

Saleem Rana's new novel, 7 Days in The Garden of the Goddess Of Wealth answers tells you in detail how to use the law of attraction for prosperity. It also comes with software. You can find out more at www.theempoweredsoul.com/7disciplines.html

Motivation - The Defining Moment Of Self-Improvement

2007-10-30T11:18:00.000+08:00

For any aspect of self-improvement, there has to be a reason for you to start and keep going. That is your motivation - the reason for doing what you do. In order to attempt any sort of improvement in your life, you need to be motivated in some way to get started. Strategies for self-improvement start with defining what it is you want to achieve and then charting a course through which you can effect the improvements or changes. These do not have to be drastic changes - they could be something as simple as making time for yourself to write in a journal each day or something to improve your health, such as quitting smoking.

Motivation comes from within. It is something that you want to do for you. This is what keeps you going, getting up each day and going off to work. Children are often the motivating force behind parents saving money, when they would ordinarily blow it on something frivolous. You know that you will need money for your children's higher education or to give them the extras that they want, such as toys and brand name clothing. This is the reason that you work each day, maintain a home and spend time enjoying each other.

If you don't have something to look forward to or see some sense of gratification in what you do, then there is no motivation to get doing it. Just meeting with colleagues helps you get a sense of who you are and your place in the world. Socialization, confidence and improvement are three main aspects of life. When you enjoy life, you can be motivated to achieve great things. Achievement does not have to be something that everyone recognizes. It can be something as simple as learning to make a quilt or to use a saw to create beautiful woodwork. The end result is the feeling of accomplishment that you have in yourself.

If you need self-help information or have articles on self-help issues, visit our Self Improventment issues section for more in-depth resources. Free Article Distribution

The Embarrassment of Self Development

2007-10-27T11:38:00.000+08:00

For a long time I yearned to improve myself; my true inner self, but something was holding me back. I made a lot of excuses back then; I didnt have time; I was too tired; I wasnt sure what direction my search should take. However, the truth was I felt embarrassed about opening myself up, especially to those close to me. All that changed when I went for a stroll along a Danish beach.

I went to Denmark for a short camping holiday. I stayed on a small island in the North Sea. It was beautiful, very peaceful; just what I was looking for. On about the third or fourth morning I went for a stroll along the beach. The beach stretched the entire length of the island, about 20km and it was about 2km wide!

After about an hour or so, I came across a young woman who was doing some type of oriental martial art. She was all by herself and seemed totally absorbed in what she was doing. Maybe this is not so strange, but what really seemed incongruous (and darn right silly to me) was that she was wielding a Samurai sword. I really did find myself thinking how silly she looked and actually became a little annoyed. My first thought was: What a poser. Did she really love herself so much she thought other people would want to see her performance with a sword? I found myself wishing she would lose her footing and fall down, and then I could say: thats what happens when you think so highly of yourself. But she didnt fall over; she kept moving, slowly and gracefully.

I continued walking along the beach. I tried to enjoy the remainder of my stroll but I kept thinking about the young woman and her sword! Why are some people such exhibitionists? I kept muttering to myself. I was no longer casually strolling along the beach, looking out to sea; I was marching, hunched over, looking at the sand beneath my shoes. I had become self-absorbed; lost in my not-too-pleasant thoughts. I was brought back to this world when I almost walked into an elderly couple. I apologised profusely. They smiled back and said not to worry; they hadnt been looking where they were going either. They were a sweet old couple, with weather beaten but healthy looking faces with open smiles. It was clear that they were very much in love with one another; they each had a hand resting on the others waist. I dont see too many elderly couples who still walk together with their arms about each and so they appeared a little odd. But what was really strange was that neither of them was wearing any clothes!

I was embarrassed, naturally. But the elderly couple werent. They were in no hurry to move on and they began to talk to me. They told me they were Danish and came often to the island. They asked where I was from and had I been before. They went on to tell me that they had been together 42 years and had 2 children. They also told me many things about themselves and asked many questions about myself. And soon, I forgot about their nakedness and felt at ease, and enjoyed our little conversation.

After a time, the old man said that they must be getting on their way and so we said our goodbyes and continued our separate walks; not once did they make any attempt to explain why they were naked. As I thought about the old couple I couldnt help but smile. They were so gentle and at ease with the world. I knew that they were what I wanted to be; free. Totally free from what others may think of them, totally free of any inhibitions to live the life they wanted. My mind then turned toward the young woman I had seen earlier. I knew, of course, that she was not an exhibitionist seeking attention. She was also free. She was doing what she wanted because it made her content. In truth, the annoyance I felt when I first saw her was not for her but for me. Annoyed because I was embarrassed, about what others might think, to do what I really wanted in life.

I came to a stop and stared out to the grey North Sea. I knew that I must break free, not from the world or people around me, but from me; myself. Without the thought crossing my mind I began to undress. I can honestly say I felt no shyness that day when I removed my last garment. I felt no different than when I undress to take a shower. I left my clothes behind and walked into the sea. I didnt stay long, less than a minute, the water was freezing. But the dip had felt like a baptism. I walked back out and picked up my clothes. I did not dress but made my way back down the beach from where I had come from.

A while later I passed the young woman. She was sitting crossed legged with the sword across her lap, looking out to sea. When I stepped across her line of vision she looked at me and smiled.

I smiled back.

Robin OBrien is founder and editor of www.selfimprovementtechniques.com and www.winchester-tourist-information.com

Why Creating a Resolution Fuels Motivation

2007-10-24T11:13:00.000+08:00

By means of something different, everybody is motivated. For any kind of goal, that is the similar. Since their high school reunion is around the corner, someone may want to lose weight, while another may want to discard those extra pounds to get into the mood. Some reasonable goals, incentives, or even the character of the person is typically, what motivates a person to do what he or she does. In order to get good grades, one person may be motivated, or strive, because they need a high GPA, while another person may be motivated to earn high marks since they will get money from a parent.

Whether you are looking to lose a few pounds, exercise more to get in better shape or to get your house structured, creating a sense of purpose is the key to motivation. Motivation is difficult without having a sense of purpose. Without a reason, your goals are not clear and your outcome that you are working towards will be harder to reach. Many different things may motivate a person, but the reason why they are motivated is typically because they have some kind of purpose.

Oftentimes, when a person creates a firm sense of purpose, or a clear reason, then the end result is easier to reach. Clear goals and understanding why you want to motivate yourself can often be the simplest way to get motivated to do nearly anything. When you get ready to work on achieving a goal and understand your purpose for doing so, it will make easier you achieve you goal. Think about what motivates you and then you can easily find ways to help yourself along the way.

Make a list of small things that you could use for motivation. These could be rewards or incentives that could range from a new book to a new dress.
On creating a sense of purpose that can help you motivate yourself, there are a few key tips. When you do not feel motivated to do something, you can create a sense of purpose by thinking of want you want to achieve.

It could be something very small, such as washing your car, or something much bigger, such as purchasing a new house. Whatever your idea is, you require having a clear purpose in mind. Perhaps your purpose for achieving this goal is to better yourself, many it will improve the lives of others or perhaps it is a way to be more efficient or make more money. Your purpose is a significant way to motivate yourself.

In addition, without a clear purpose, your motivation will drop when your work becomes difficult. You lose sight of why you are doing whatever it is that you are striving to accomplish. You can easily give up and you no longer have in sight what your end result can or will be.

Understanding your goals, your reason for what you are working for all creates a clear sense of purpose. This makes motivating yourself so much easier and helps you reach your mission much faster and easier than without a clear purpose.
Another great motivational tool is by rewarding yourself for reaching your small goals along the way. After you have thought about your reason for wanting to do something, consider what you would get pleasure from a reward. Often, small rewards can motivate and help make your end goal easier to achieve.

Having a clear purpose for an outcome gives you the clearness you need to become motivated. Motivation is near impossible to achieve without this clarity. Understanding purpose which means, who, what, where and why of your motivation gives you the key self-assurance needed to meet your goals.
Writing a list or journal of goals will help you reach your end result is another way to keep your purpose in mind and to keep yourself motivated.

If you want to exercise more, possibly keeping a journal of what kind of exercise you do and how long will help you maintain a clear picture in your mind. By looking at your exercise log, your motivation and purpose could be spurred each day. You will start by making small changes each day, if you are trying to attain a large goal, such as losing twenty pounds. These small changes are your goals that will cause you to your successful weight loss.

I hope you have gotten some good ideas from this article and that you are able to use them. I want to thank you reading. Go ahead and look around to find additional helpful tips and information at http://www.selfhelpzone.com/

Nishanth Reddy is an author and publisher of popular Self Help Blog. For more information on motivation, goal setting and success and visit: www.selfhelpzone.com/category/motivation/

Do You Value Yourself?

2007-10-21T15:28:00.000+08:00

We all live. We all work. We all wish to have a family, have children, retire peacefully and then pass away. Is that all in our life? What is the true value you put to your life? What are you? What do you want to achieve so that you make a difference in the world? What memories you want to leave? These are questions all of us must ask. Billions of people in the world lead a routine life and pass away. Is that enough/ Can we not do something better? How to make ourselves valuable?

We make ourselves by giving. When we make others happy, we become happy. When we do something unselfishly, we feel good. Most of the problems in our life arise because of absence of giving. Marriages are getting broken for small reasons, because neither the husband nor the wife wants to give in. Both have their demands that must be met, otherwise separation.

Every child wants admission in the best college. Every person wants the best job. Everybody wants the best comfort. All of us want. What about giving? Few of us do that and that is our problem for dissatisfaction in our own life. We are slowly losing our self-esteem because of our own behavior.

Once we begin giving, we will be rebuilding our esteem. Try to help those around you. Tolerate few nuisances. Forgive others for their faults. Do not hurt people with harsh words. Do not act in a manner that destroys a life. Contribute to the world so that the world remembers us for our goodness. All of us may not become saints, but we can surely follow in their footsteps.

Pause - Yield - Choose: Your Three Powers for Happiness and Vitality

2007-10-18T15:20:00.000+08:00

Copyright 2006 Tom Russell

When I was a young man of seventeen I learned to fly airplanes. My first flight as a student pilot taught the value of the PAUSE.

On my very first lesson the instructor put me at the controls. Great tension possessed me as we lifted off and I wrestled the plane up to an altitude of a few thousand feet. All of a sudden Wally said to me, "Tom, the airplane was made to fly itself. Relax. Cooperate with it."

For the first time in the flight I noticed my state. I was gripping the controls with everything I had. I was gritting my teeth. I was a wreck but was completely unaware of it until Wally had me PAUSE.

The PAUSE brings you back home to your released state. It returns you to the natural flow of life that "flies itself." Strain and struggle are replaced by easy taps on the controls. You and daily life work in harmony to produce spiritual flight.

Here's how to apply the pause: Simply let go and know where you are. Often a deep breath arrives to refresh you. See as much as possible about your present state and the world around you. Be aware of both your environment and yourself as an integral part of it. Hold this new state for as long as you can.

The Power to YIELD

Picture a man walking a path to the top of a high mountain. At a certain point a small boulder comes crashing toward him. Stunned, he reaches down with both arms and stops the boulder. It jars him terribly. A moment later another boulder heads his way. He does the same thing. But with the approach of the third boulder a new and higher idea comes to him. At the last moment he simply STEPS ASIDE. He YIELDS. The boulder passes right by.

This is how we can deal with difficult and obnoxious people. They are on the prowl for a fight and when you don't give it to them they fall forward from their own momentum. It is amazing how powerless difficult people become when you consciously let them win. They are so ready to fight!

More importantly, YIELD is how to heal emotional hurts and conflicts that often lie deep in the mind. You are the calm spark of awareness that sees the turmoil without entering it or manipulating it or demanding that it go away. Release your efforts to handle them. Let them run their course and go where they want to go while you seek insight and understanding into precisely what is happening.

As author Vernon Howard so beautifully said once, "The problem is not the thought; the problem is the thought about the thought." Mental gymnastics are powerless to relieve deep-seated pains. It is the Light itself that heals us, not machinations of the mind. The spirit knows precisely where to go and what to do. No mistake, no blunder, no grief is too much for it. Life with a capital "L" has an amazing power to renew itself if allowed to work without interference.

The Power to CHOOSE

To choose is to refuse to catch the ropes thrown at you from every direction. For example, people often throw negative ropes by their facial expressions and by their quick little remarks. The TV itself is a giant rope-tossing machine. But the power all of these rope tossers possess derives from one thing: YOUR DECISION TO CATCH THEIR ROPES! You can choose in favor of yourself. You can stay in your own intelligent zone of independence and free flowing energy by letting the ropes fall right to the ground.

It was a great relief to me when I realized that a large part of my problem was my demand that rope tossers stop tossing ropes at me. I finally understood that they are never going to stop. The ropes they throw are a result of the life-level they inhabit. The people who run the media are never going to stop. Sleeping people who have no interest in self-development are going to spend their entire lives tossing ropes. It was my demand that they stop that created anguish.

Most importantly, I can choose to refuse the thought ropes thrown within my own mind. Guilt, anger, worry -- these are all thought ropes that linger in our minds because we catch them. What a pleasure to see a tossed rope that says something like, "You'll never make it, you're too old to change, you had your chance but missed it" and simply let it fall into nothingness.

Conclusion

PAUSE, YIELD, CHOOSE are never contradictory because they are three different powers that you can use at different times. Sometimes it's best to work with YIELD. Other times it's more profitable to turn your attention toward a refusal to catch ropes. When things are hectic remember the PAUSE. But at a higher level these powers combine into one dynamic force. As your skill grows in their application you'll find that they fit together and work in perfect harmony. Your awareness of their existence guarantees their development.

Tom Russell is the host of www.SuperWisdom.com and the author of "The Power of Vertical Thinking" and "Seven Secrets to Light Up Your Essence." His free newsletter, The SuperWisdom Ezine, is read by subscribers in more than 40 countries. You are cordially invited to visit the website and subscribe.

7 Tips to Staying Motivated While Working From Home

2007-10-15T11:28:00.000+08:00

Copyright 2006 Sandra P. Martini

Youre doing it. For years youve wanted to work from home and you are finally doing it. You are no longer an employee who has a J O B; you are now a business owner, self-employed, ruler of your own destiny AND you have inherited all the responsibilities that come with owning a business:

* You are the manager * You are the marketer * You are the service provider/widget maker * You are the bookkeeper

And the list goes on. We often get so busy running our businesses that we forget why we started them in the first place.

So what does a small business owner do to stay motivated while working from home?

1. Remember the why.

Take a step back to remember the reason you went into business in the first place. What was your inspiration? It helps to focus intently on how you felt when you first realized you wanted to be successfully self-employed. For me, it was the sense of freedom and independence that I knew would come with success as an entrepreneur.

2. Give yourself a deadline.

If youre procrastinating about a project, you may be motivated by the self-imposed pressure of a deadline. Try giving yourself a deadline that you wont want to back down on: send an email to friends announcing a new product launch, email your client with a due date for that big project youre working on, take reservations for your first teleclass, you get the idea.

3. Maintain a support system.

One of the hardest parts of being a solopreneur can be the sense of isolation. When things go right (or wrong), we no longer have the water cooler to go to. Be sure there is someone who you can share with, someone who is available for a quick motivational chat when you need one.

4. Keep the goal in sight.

A simple, yet effective motivational tool is to keep your goals in sight literally. Ive taken a picture of my dream house and made it the background wallpaper on my computer. One glance at it is a megadose of motivation for me!

5. Take a nap.

As counterintuitive as it sounds, taking a powernap is one of the best ways to rejuvenate your body AND mind. So the next time youre feeling overwhelmed or low, slowly and intently read each of your goals and then go take a powernap. Let your subconscious work on ways to manifest those goals while you rest.

When you wake, youll be raring to go!

6. Reward yourself.

When faced with a large project, unpleasant task or anything that overwhelms you, plan a reward for once its done. The reward can be as simple as a quiet bath with candles or as exciting as a professional sporting event. Just be sure to plan a reward that YOU want and will enjoy!

7. Take a break.

Youve most likely never worked harder than when you are first starting your own business. In addition to actually doing all the work, you need to work on marketing, invoicing and other overhead or non-billable tasks.

Dont get caught in the trap of all work and no play. Be sure you take days off and breaks throughout the day to rejuvenate and gain some perspective. Whenever Im stuck on a project, I grab one of the dogs and go for a walkby the time I return to the office, things have usually sorted themselves out in my head.

It doesn't matter how successful your home business is or how much you love to work from home; both new and established entrepreneurs face the motivational dilemma at some point and while some of the above motivational strategies may seem conflicting on their face giving yourself a deadline versus taking a break for example they all have their place in the life of a successful entrepreneur.

Online Business Manager Entrepreneur, Sandra Martini, publishes the 'Effective Entrepreneur' weekly e-zine. She also coaches small business owners to more efficiently manage their businesses while increasing profits and having fun. Sandra's coaching programs are available via teleconferencing, emails and telephone calls. For more information or to sign-up for Effective Entrepreneur, visit www.online-biz-coach.com today.

When Motivation Counts

2007-10-12T11:22:00.000+08:00

Have you stopped to think just how short life really is? Do you realize that every day you spend worrying or feeling bad about yourself is one more day that you are putting off being happy? If you are ever to get the most out of life, now is the time to start. Is there a dream, purpose, or accomplishment you have desired for a long time? Then now is the time that motivation counts!

What are the components of a life worth living? Many people would say that their relationship with their spouse and their children are an important part of what makes their life worthwhile. Do keep this in mind, though. Family life and marriage are not always easy. It requires that you put time in with those special people. It requires you to learn to be patient and keep your cool, too. Right now is the time to get motivated and start taking that weekly date with your spouse. Right now is the time to start having dinner with your kids and talking about their day. Now is the time motivation counts!

If you're single, you don't have to give up hope. You can know that fulfillment, too. The person you eventually attract will depend a lot on the person you are. A good rule of thumb is to be the person you desire to make your mate. In other words, do you want someone who is patient and loyal? Honest and humble? Virtuous and hard-working? Then be those things yourself. Then get out there and meet people. Or go online. With today's internet options, there is no reason everyone can't find Mr. or Ms. Right. But now is the time to get motivated and work toward that dream. Motivation counts now!

Another thing that makes life worth living is having the ability to have fun. This can mean having enough money to take vacations and the like, and with motivation, you might be able to have the money you want. However, if you don't learn to relax and enjoy what you have, the money itself might never really bring you the fun you crave. An easy-going, up-beat, contented attitude goes farther than money when it comes to having fun. If you don't have this type of outlook, then now is the time to get motivated and become more positive. Now is when motivation counts!

Almost everyone is required to work in order to have food on the table and a roof over their head. If your job makes you miserable, then even with a great family and lots of fun, you're going to be putting in forty hours a week of misery. How can you improve this picture? Do you need to look for a job in a different line of work? Or would a successful work-at-home business be perfect for you? If your income or work tasks are unsatisfactory to you, then it's time to push yourself a little to make a change. Motivation counts now!

So when does motivation count? Maybe a better question would be, when doesn't it count?

For more personal growth articles visit: www.personalgrowthunlimited.com

5 Tips To Supercharge Your Motivation

2007-10-09T11:56:00.000+08:00

Motivation is the driving force behind life-enhancing change. It comes from knowing exactly what you want to do and having an insatiable, burning desire to do whats necessary to get it. It keeps your dream on track as it is the power of motivation that keeps you going when the going gets tough.

Heres 5 top tips to help you supercharge your motivation:

1. Create a picture board and fill it with images of your desired goals. The car you want to own, the house you want to live in, the area where you want to live yes, theyre the obvious ones. Others could be pictures of holiday destinations, trophies, first-class travel tickets, clothes you want to buy, fine restaurants you want to frequent whatever you can think of that gets your pulse racing.

2. GET ANGRY. If you want to change your life for the better then get angry about where youre at now. Having a blas attitude towards change isnt whats needed and it wont create a strong desire within you. So ask: Why do I want to change? Is it because youre FED UP with debts? Does your job DRIVE YOU CRAZY? Is your life DULL AND PRECITABLE? Are you SICK AND TIRED of doing the same thing week in week out? Are you BORED BEYOND BELIEF by the dull, uninspiring, unhappy people you associate with? THEN GET ANGRY ABOUT IT. And I mean REAL ANGRY. Write it all down, all of the frustrating, unrewarding, miserable lot of it that makes every day a dull slog until your final days. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?

3. Speaking of your final days, start to appreciate the value of time. Time is one of the most precious resources you have and it is also a NON RENEWABLE resource. You can either use it fully or squander it. If you want to create change youre going to have to invest a lot of time to make it happen. Start to reduce the time you waste on irrelevancies: Television, newspapers, lie-ins, weekends spent shopping, partying, dining out, visiting an endless line of relatives and friends these wont help you get what you want and all of them will rob time from you. Valuable time that you can use much more effectively by investing it in YOU. Remember this: You have a finite amount of time here on Earth. You dont know how much time you have no one does. But its how you use the time you have that counts. So make your time count and that means starting from right NOW.

4. Conformity. Are you a mindless little sheep whos way too timid to pursue your own way? Do you have to follow where everyone else goes, doing exactly what everyone else does and therefore, who gets the same levels of happiness as all the other little sheep? Seriously, does this describe YOU? Are you too frightened to be different than all of the other sheep because they wouldnt like it if you decided to follow a different path? So you dutifully trot along following all the other sheep because if theyre doing it then thats how it is right? But if you do what everyone else does youll just get what everyone else gets. Do you want to be a mindless, timid little sheep who blindly follows all the other sheep? Or do you want to be a leader, a warrior who possesses the courage to be uniquely you and to do what you want to do and make your dreams happen? If so then this means you have to be more like a tiger than a sheep. Do you really want to be a sheep? I mean, havent we got enough sheep already?

5. Fear your fear. Fear is the force that is determined to stop you in your tracks and rob your dreams from you. But it can only do this if you let it. Are you going to let this cruel destructive charlatan trample on your dreams, steal your happiness and crush your spirit? Imagine this thought haunting your final days: I didnt do the things I wanted because I was too frightened to live. And by then, itll be far too late to conquer fear. Refuse to let fear spoil your life and start taking action now!

The world is waiting for your unique gifts. Why keep it waiting any longer?

Chris Green is the author of the new book Conquering Fear, a special program which will show you how to conquer fear and attract greater happiness, success and prosperity into your life. For more info, click here => www.conqueringfear.net

Exercise Tips: 25 Ways to Stay Motivated

2007-10-06T11:03:00.000+08:00

We all know that exercise can be pure magic for the mind, body and soul. But how do you go from a sporadic, on again, off again exerciser to someone for whom exercise is a lifelong habit, as natural and necessary as going to work and eating regular meals?

Here are 25 tips from someone who has been on both sides.

1. The first thing to do is to ask yourself: Why are you exercising? Are you trying to get in shape for an upcoming event? Do you want to lose weight, sleep better, increase your energy, gain strength, add muscle tone and flexibility, or just feel a heightened sense of well being? If the reason you are exercising has anything to do with someone else (for example, your boyfriend says you need to lose weight or get in shape), you need a new reason (and, quite possibly, a new boyfriend).

2. Set goals. Set both a short term goal, to achieve in three to six weeks, and a long term goal, to achieve over the course of a year. Make sure your goals are achievable enough that they are not discouraging, but high enough that you have an incentive to tie your workout shoes each day. It is also important that your goals are specific and directly related to your specific motivation for exercising. For example, my main motivation for exercising is to consistently maintain my brighter mood and the calm, energized feeling that I get only from exercising, so my goal is to work out at least 5 days per week. My other motivation is to gain strength and cardiovascular endurance, so my other goals have to do with how long and how quickly I run.

3. Keep an exercise journal or log. Write down how your exercise is making you feel each day. How is your exercise benefiting your mood, energy levels, quality of sleep, weight, and so on? Do some exercises have more significant effects than others? Chart your progress in regard to your specific goals.

4. Take photos of yourself each month in your workout gear so you have a visual record of your results.

5. Make sure you are working out hard enough to release endorphins. Of course, you will want to talk to a doctor before starting any workout regimen, and you want to make sure that you are exercising at the optimum level for you, your body type, and your fitness level. I find that I am much more likely to continue with an exercise program if each workout releases those endorphins and immediately improves they way I feel.

6. Advertisements for fitness products (especially athletic shoes) can be tremendously motivating. Purchase a fitness magazine and make an inspirational collage of images, advertisements and slogans that speak to you. Post your collage where you will see it each day.

7. Make sure you are using proper technique. You want to avoid injury, above all, so check with a doctor or trainer if you experience any pain, or if you are not sure whether you are doing a particular exercise correctly.

8. Join an online community, such as WeightWatchers.com or Ediets.com, which encourages you to log and track your exercise each day.

9. If you enjoy working out with someone, call a friend to help hold you accountable for those daily workouts.

10. Join a group that combines fitness goals with charity fundraising. The Team In Training, from the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, for example, provides training to walk or run a whole or half marathon, or to participate in a triathlon or 100 mile bike ride, all while raising money for a good cause.

11. If you prefer to work out alone, give yourself something fun to do while you exercise. Find some good heart pumping music or listen to books on tape. A suspenseful audiobook may be all you need to get on those running shoes each day.

12. Identify the excuses you like to use and have a ready made response. If time is an issue, make sure your workout clothes are ready to go. If you have young children, get a good jogging stroller or set up a babysitting swap with another mom in your neighborhood: you can watch her children while she works out and vice versa.

13. Make sure you have the right gear, which can make all the difference in the comfort level of your workout. A good pair of shoes is essential. And weather resistant clothing or a membership to an indoor gym can help you fight off your own excuses when weather conditions are less than ideal.

14. Once you find an exercise that you particularly enjoy, do a Google search to find out more about any coaches or specialists that may be able to provide inspiration or special training, either through tapes, books, or online resources. If you are a runner, for example, check out JohnBingham.com.

15. Recognize that your will to exercise is going to fluctuate, and exercise anyway. Sometimes it helps if I promise myself that I can stop my workout after 10 minutes if I still want to. At that point, I am usually feeling so much better that I finish the workout.

16. Place a giant star on your calendar each day to indicate that you completed your workout. These visual rewards can be so motivating.

17. Change your routine as you reach new goals. Add zest to your workout and avoid the exercise plateau by increasing the intensity or the duration of your workout, or by trying a new workout or sport.

18. Hire a trainer. If you are in an exercise rut, consider consulting with a personal trainer for a session or two. You will learn new techniques and find fresh motivation, as well.

19. Try not to take more than one day off at a time. I have found this really important to avoid losing valuable momentum. If I take two days off, it becomes very easy to take another day, and then another day. That means that if your workout is only part of your weekday routine, weave it into your weekend routine, too.

20. Be gentle with yourself. If you miss a workout or two or three, get right back to your regular schedule. You will feel better instantly.

21. Choose an exercise that you are likely to do each day. Some experts say that walking is the best exercise simply because it is something that is easy to do on a continual basis. There is no need for special equipment, and you can do it absolutely anywhere.

22. If you are walking or running, get a good pedometer to help you track your progress.

23. Schedule your daily exercise on your to do list and in your planner. Think of it as simply something you need to do before your head hits the pillow.

24. Give yourself simple rewards. It is generally best if these rewards are not edible, since a food reward can be a tad demoralizing after you have just worked to burn so many calories in a workout. For long term goals, treat yourself to a new pair of athletic shoes or other fitness equipment. For short term goals, consider a new fitness magazine, workout video, or simply fresh flowers for the dining room table.

25. Try to think of exercise as something you do for yourself: a gift you give yourself, a way to stay balanced and focused, and time when you can be alone with your thoughts.

Jamie Jefferson writes for Momscape at www.momscape.com . Visit today for the latest online Coupon Codes including money-saving shoe store coupons.

If You Can You Can Do Anything

2007-10-03T11:38:00.000+08:00

I recently had an epiphany. Many may consider it a minor feat, yet for me it feels like a big accomplishment. I did something I didnt think I could do and I changed my own image of myself. I also learned something that can be applied to most everything in life.

I have never thought of myself as a swimmer. Sure, I took lessons when I was a kid just like everyone else, but I struggled with it. I did not find it easy. I thought everyone else was a better swimmer than me and I did not think I could do it. So I didnt swim. For years and years I just didnt even try.

But this summer I was inspired. I wanted to swim. Not just swim, I wanted to become a good swimmer. Being a Mommy is definitely inspirational and my inspiration to swim came from my two-year-old daughter. My beautiful little daughter inspired me. I took her to a mommy-tot class and she loved it. Every time she was in the pool she loved it. She seems to be natural at it, just the opposite of what I was. Her lessons have been over for weeks yet still every single day at 8:00 in the morning, she puts on her swimsuit and she is ready to go to the pool.

My family always enjoyed boating and water-skiing, but my lack of skill in swimming never seemed to be a problem, after all I could always grab the life jacket! But watching my daughter swim and feeling the joy she felt, I realized that my family was going to be a swimming family and as the Mom, I needed to catch up!

So, I decided I would start to improve my swimming skills by swimming laps. I asked the swim instructor when the lap lanes were mostly empty so I didnt interrupt any of the triathletes or the regulars and I just decided to do it.

At first I was tentative, I didnt know how I would do. After all, it had been 30 years or more since I did any serious swimming and even then I was never comfortable. So I started with a kickboard and I went across the pool a few times. But that got real boring, real fast. So I tried to swim and breathe and swim and breathe. I remembered how, I realized that I just needed to practice. The first time I made it all the way across without stopping I was elated. But the breathing was the scary part. So I concentrated on breathing and as I got better I realized that the trick with breathing in the water is not the Inhale but rather the Exhale-the releasing of all of the air in your lungs to make room to bring in more air. You have to release the resistance of the last breath in order to get the next breath. Soon I was able to breathe easily in the pool. Now I can swim lap after lap without any problems.

As I came home and told my husband (my best friend) every single, minute detail of my newfound passion, I excitedly declared, If I can breathe, I can do Anything! Wow, what a concept! And how true it really is based on everything that I have learned in life! We really are limitless beings, so of course, if we are breathing we are capable of just about anything!

So swimming gave me a great metaphor for lifeIf you can breathe, You can do anything! One of my favorite, late, great, mentors W. Clement Stone said, Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, It can achieve. Hes rightIf you can believe it (and you are breathing!) you can achieve it. It may take some work or practice and you may need to release some resistance but If you can Breathe, You can do Anything!

Karen Lynch is the creator of the motivation and inspiration website www.livethepower.com You can learn about using the power of your own mind by picking up a copy of a Free Ebook of "The Power of the Subconscious Mind" by Dr. Joseph Murphy at www.livethepower.com/home.html

From Fear and Paralysis to Positive Action

2007-09-30T13:38:00.000+08:00

By Sandra Sinclair

When you feel paralyzed about taking action toward a desired goal, fear of failure could be a possible reason. Fear of failure can be a huge obstacle to taking positive action toward your desired outcomes, because so much personal esteem and happiness can depend on the outcome. After all, attempting something important to you, only to fail at accomplishing it, can potentially make you feel less than capable or deserving, or even crushed at the outcome. So in order to prevent this from happening, its often easier to just never try at all.

If trying and not reaching your desired goal would feel terrible, then dreaming about it and not taking action can feel far more comfortable. That way, you can dream about what you want and then create reasons for inaction to make yourself feel better about never trying to reach your goal. You may even convince yourself that you could do it, but rather than risk failure, you can just dream, and stay safe. This is a natural, self-protective mechanism. Your mind is truly brilliant, and knows how to protect you from getting hurt.

To change fear of failure into a force for positive action, you may have to change your thinking about what your desired outcome means to you in terms of your own happiness. This may surprise you, because what Im suggesting is quite different from what we usually hear. Were usually told something like: If you dont want it enough, youll never get there, Nothing easy is worth having etc. Or even the much more seemingly innocuous What would make you happy? The overall message is that if its worth having, its going to involve a lot of pain and struggle, but to achieve happiness, you must achieve this outcome.

However, if your very happiness is riding on the success or failure of this venture, you can literally block yourself from trying, because so much is riding on the result.

So at this point, you can ask yourself these questions:

How much do I need to achieve this outcome in order to be happy?

If I was still able to desire my goal without actually needing it in order to be happy, what would happen? In other words, can I accept reaching or not reaching my desired outcome and still be happy?

What would happen if I chose to be happy right now?

You may say that having this attitude of happiness now could cause you to lose motivation for your goal, your purpose, or motivation for anything, for that matter, but I have another proposal for you: What if actually being happy right now, whether or not you accomplish your desired outcome, actually made you more powerful in reaching it? You may find that wanting a goal without attachment to the outcome can change paralysis into positive, inspired action.

Does this attitude change guarantee that youll reach your goal? No, you may not reach your desired outcome, even with this attitude. However, youre probably much more likely to achieve what you want through happiness and ease than through efforting and struggling against fear of failure and paralysis.

You may also say that its not that simple to just decide to be happy that its not the way the world works. But the truth is that happiness is a decision, just as unhappiness is a decision. It can be as simple or as complicated as you want it to be. Its a decision thats independent of your past experience, and of others actions and opinions, unless you wish it so. No one can tell you what to believe or think. Any beliefs that were handed to you early on about the way the world works, what youre supposed to feel or what youre capable of are only truthful if you decide that they are.

You decide your own truth, every moment.

Sandra Sinclair

Sandra Sinclair is a personal development coach and author of The Happy Path Mini-Course- 5 clear steps you can take to create your ideal life, a free mini-course, at: http://www.thehappypath.com/

Practice Self Talk and Postive Affirmation Statements in Your Life

2007-09-28T11:33:00.000+08:00

Positive self-talk means purposely giving yourself positive reinforcement, motivation, and recognition- just as you would do for a friend. Congratulate yourself when you do well, and remind yourself of your abilities, accomplishments, strengths and skills. Keep a to-do list, check off accomplishments, and review your progress periodically.

Make self-talk work for you. When you habitually say to yourself has a very profound impact on your self-image, your self-esteem, and your performance as well as eventual success. Remember that your subconscious triggers physiological responses to match the pictures and thoughts that you have of yourself to make them happens. Make this work for you by keeping your self-talk positive.

For example say to yourself either I did a good job on that changing a friends oil even though I took a quart and for myself or I did a good job of not paying a good friend the cost of supplies for the efforts he did for me .

Stop negative self-talk. You may well be quick to nag yourself because your mother wanted you to more than perfect. However, negative self talk can be damaging because your subconscious believes what you say to your when you repeat that negative talk in your mind over and over. How is your subconscious to know otherwise? If you catch yourself using negative self-talk, stop and rephrase. Eliminate the negative words. Focus instead on the best course you can take and do it.

Make positive communications a habit. Focus on the positive in goal statements, self-talk, and all communications. Compare the following phrases, and notice how the positive words convey confidence, commitment, and enthusiasm.

For example instead of I will try substitute the phrase I will . Instead of saying to you I should do insert the phrase I will do . Try saying I want to or I choose to instead of the more common I must .

Focus with affirmation statements. Affirmative statements are positive self-statements or reminders to help you achieve goals. They are positive messages with a punch mental bumper stickers of sorts to motivate your subconscious mind to work for you.

Here are guidelines to help you to use the powerful tool of affirmative statements as vital mental reminder technique.

1) Make the statements personal to yourself. Not arbitrary or generic. Use the phrase I , your own name , or you

2) Keep affirmations short. How can you use the affirmations if you cannot remember them?

3) Phrase your affirmations positively. The mind accepts as truth the words that you give it. Use positive words only as affirmations. Leave out any negative words. For example say I will not be nervous during my interview with the warden . Rather say I will be calm and self-assured during my interview

4) Include a positive emotion. A phrase that triggers a positive emotion strengthens the affirmation. For example My goals are valuable and it excites me.

5) Phrase affirmations as fact. Phrase a goal as though it is happening even if you have not achieved it yet. Your subconscious believes mental messages and works to make them a reality.

6) Say your affirmation at least 6 times a day. Repetition is life. Repetition enhances self-confidence, acts as a reminder, and stimulates your subconscious to help you achieve your goals in life.

It cannot be overstated the impact that positive self talk and affirmative statements can help you towards the vital goals that you have identified in your life. Remember that without goals even if you work hard you are like a ship without a rudder.

These powerful tools of positive self talk and positive affirmations can more than help speed you along to your chosen goals.

Bill Piker old dog!'s Blog blog.360.yahoo.com/blog/slideshow.html?p=3id=ROjOVC8wIv9KijBAErka www.aceemploymentservices.net

The Best Learning Tool

2007-09-26T11:25:00.000+08:00

Copyright 2006 Donovan Baldwin

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." -- Thomas A. Edison

What do these people have in common? Walt Disney, Winston Churchill, Thomas Edison, Abraham Lincoln, Joanne Rowling (Author of the Harry Potter books), just to name a few.

Well, I'll give you a hint. You might say they all attended the same school. Took some of the same courses, in a manner of speaking.

Every one of them is famous today, and is considered to be the model of a successful person. However, at times in their lives, and not just during the early years, they had pretty much either failed, or had not achieved anything of note in their lives.

They all attended, in one form or another, the school of hard knocks. But, they learned in that school, and they eventually accumulated enough knowledge, enough common sense, enough experience, enough guts, maybe, to rise to a point where their names have been recorded as a part of history.

Oh sure, circumstance played a part. Had not World War II happened along, Winston Churchill would have remained a has-been rather than becoming one of the world's most famous statesmen. Had Abraham Lincoln caught a fatal disease in his youth, we would never have known his name, and how much of our world would be different?

We have to look at our lives and our circumstances in this light. I AM here now, and I CAN make various choices. One of the choices is to do nothing. One of the choices, however is to take a stand, give it the old college try, go out swinging...pick your literary cliche.

In the world of network marketing and internet marketing, those with experience and "success" can almost to a person tell story after story of failure, embarassment, defeat, rejection, and depression. I've never met a person yet who joined a program and was making appreciable amounts of money in just a few days. I've HEARD about such things, and I am sure that there are a few who have either had the skill or luck to create a huge network business practically overnight. However, it doesn't happen to most of us.

What DOES happen to most of those who sign up for a network marketing program is that while we AREN'T experiencing overnight success, we DO experience failure, embarassment, defeat, rejection, and depression, not to mention other "...slings and arrows of outrageous fortune." This combination of negative pressures without any offsetting positives (I'm talking about income) in the early stages of a network or internet business causes most of the so-called "failures" and drop-outs in the networking world.

The sad part is that most of these people do not truly become "failures" until they actually give up. Yes, some will never be successful, but that is true about anything from brain surgery to law to flipping burgers. Some people are just not going to be good at certain things. Some people are going to be in the wrong place at the wrong time almost every time, but that does not mean that they are failures or should be branded as such by themselves or by anyone else.

Temporary failure, if we can see it that way, is not just a course in the school of hard knocks, it is a coach. Just as a coach may pit a boxer, wrestler, or entire team against a tougher opponent in hopes of teaching them to overcome such opponents, failure gives us the opportunity to learn new skills and to unlearn old, useless skills. Those who continue to grow through this process are the ones who will eventually be labeled "successful".

It is necessary to see the obstacles that a new marketer faces as training experiences, not as an insurmountable or immoveable objects.

The sad part is that so many people recruiting for network marketing programs go out of their way to play up the potential gains of the business while failing to prepare the new player for the difficulties of the game. Many of us who have achieved varying degrees of success in network marketing or internet marketing can tell many of the same stories. We tried all kinds of programs, methods, and techniques. We bought, or bought into, all kinds of books, programs, software, and miscellaneous mumbo-jumbo. We did it because we were ignorant, and perhaps a little greedy, but eventually we learned, and eventually we succeeded.

I now make a living off the internet, the mystical target, the six-figure-income. However, beside me is a bookcase full of books, on top of my work station are all kinds of software, loaded onto my computer are many programs, tucked into nooks and crannies around the room are folders full of papers. Among all of these are many things that I use to promote and grow my business, but, to tell the truth, I could probably dispose of ninety percent of it and never miss it. I have spent so much time following the wrong paths, and so much money (my term is "accidental tuition") buying things that did little or nothing for me. And yet, I cannot truly regret all that because I never gave up the idea that some day I would succeed, and each "failure" just was another lesson learned. Eventually, all those lessons reached the point where one day my wife looked at me and said, "You know all those ads you use to read to me about making a six-figure-income?"

I replied, "Yes. What about it?"

She said, "You are."

I had graduated from the school of hard knocks, at least for the time being, but I did not grauate because I was brilliant. I graduated because I didn't give up.

Wow! Me and Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln.....! Okay, I'll shut up now, but I started with a quote and I'll end with one.

"The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do." -- Walter Bagehot

Donovan Baldwin is a Dallas area writer and internet entrepreneur. A graduate of the University of West Florida, Pensacola, and a member of Mensa, he creates website content for his own use and that of other webmasters. He offers home based internet business opportunities at www.donovanbaldwin.com/

Hopes Dreams: A Critical Ingredient In The Lives Of Caregivers And Their Loved

2007-09-24T11:18:00.000+08:00

Its human nature to hang onto two basic hopes the hope of overcoming illness and the hope of delaying death. However, in many cases the reality is that your loved one faces a steady medical decline, a life-threatening illness or impending death.

Hope is like the vase that contains your sweet-smelling colorful dreams. Dreams, like flowers, change over the seasons of life and the stages of caregiving. Yet, no matter how desperate the situation, there is always room for hope and dreams. It is the magical salve for the suffering of caregivers and their loved ones.

Hope is the optimistic belief that you can expect a better tomorrow.

Sometimes that better tomorrow happens as a result of something that changes in the outside world such as a new drug or unexpected help. Sometimes the better tomorrow arrives because you see things from a new perspective. Hopes and dreams become the guiding light for the tough choices that you and your loved ones face.

Here are 7 tips for hanging onto hope:

1. Give a voice to your secret longings, wishes and dreams.

If you had a magic wand, what would you wish for? Maybe its turning back the sands of time and taking away the car keys from your father instead of sitting at his hospital bedside where he is recovering from the car accident he caused. Maybe its imagining that youll turn on the news and learn of a new miracle cure for the cancer thats taking over your mothers body or for the dementia thats erasing your grandmothers memories. Hope might be something simple like a good nights sleep for you and your loved one. Say it out loud, We could use a good nights sleep.

2. Define the reality.

In the course of taking care of tens of thousands of patients, Ive seen miracles happen. However, most people experience likely events. Grasp an understanding of your current reality based on whats most likely to happen naturally.

When you define the most likely outcome, it helps you decide where to place your hopes. For example, a friend of mine who is a family doctor told me of a conversation between him and a loving mother whose 6-year-old child had a relapse of leukemia after a bone marrow transplant. There was an experimental treatment offered halfway across the country. The mother wanted to know where to take her child: to a new hospital across the country for lots of pokeys as her son called them, or Disneyland to enjoy the final days of his life. Does she hope for a cure, or for the fullest remaining days of her childs life?

3. Recognize your loved ones hopes may be different than your own.

The mother of the 6-year-old made the medical choices for her son. What if the person with the leukemia is your father, who is competent to make his own medical choices? Maybe you cannot bear the thought of losing him and hope that a new treatment will cure him. Maybe your father shares that perspective. However, what if he considers experimental treatment with certain discomfort and an uncertain benefit and decides he would rather live out his days enjoying his grandchildren?

You may find it difficult to support him. You do not want to burden your loved onea with your disappointment that he has placed hope in a different place than you would if you were in his shoes. Thats when you turn to a trusted friend and say, I wish Dad would make a different choice. I want him to fight. Im sad and angry that hes chosen death.

4. Honor your loved ones hopes.

As a caregiver, its important to understand that your loved one is the patient. Its his or her body and life. As much as you think you know what the best choice is, your job is to help your loved ones realize their hopes.

5. Mourn the loss of the old dream.

Gretta said, Mom had always hoped to live all of her days in her home filled with the memories of Dad and small children and happy holidays...and not so happy holidays. It just wasnt safe any more. We moved her to a terrific retirement community that has everything she wants, including a beautiful garden. Still, shes sad because its not what she had always imagined.

You too could have a dream of a healthy and independent loved one thats hard to let go of. The loss of a dream can be as painful as the loss of a loved one. Mourning the loss of a dream brings healing.

6. Create a new dream.

You can still have hopes and dreams! Theyre just different. Maybe the hope for cure is replaced with the hope for days or hours or moments free of pain. Maybe its the dream that your fragmented family will come together and heal old wounds around the deathbed.

State your dreams as attaining something you want rather than avoiding something you dont want. As medical conditions change, its important that you and your loved one revisit the dream. If youre disappointed about the course of events, ask, Is this the loss of a dream, or a hope I can fulfill?

7. Focus on your loved one.

Always remember, caregiving is first and foremost about supporting the person you love. Yes, you as a caregiver have hopes and dreams. Maybe the heart of caregiving is the willingness to fulfill the hopes and dreams the vase filled with brilliant blooms of those for whom you care whether or not you hold the same vision.

Follow these tips, and you will be sure to hold onto your hopes and dreams. Remember, no matter how desperate the situation, there is still hope for the dream. The dream will change as the condition of your loved one change. Just like theres always a flower to put in a vase -- theres always hope.

Dr.Vicki,board-certified surgeon who left operating room to help families take the most direct path from illness to optimal health.Her book,The Personal Health Journal,will help you understand direct your loved ones health story. Empower yourself with the tips tools that will help you partner with their doctor more effectively; save your loved ones life at: www.drvicki.org/drvicki-store-health-journal.html

MP3 Players: Why You Should Buy One

2007-09-22T11:09:00.000+08:00

AN MP3 player will be relatively small price to pay for your grand victory behind a poker table and I do not mean that as a joke. Studies conducted over past years have proved direct connection between player's performance during the poker game and the type of music these players listened to while playing it online or at live casinos.

What can we say about poker game? This game is full with emotions as well as strategic moves and considering the number of books written on that theme, I can assure you that poker game is here to stay for a very long time. Students, college professors, professional players and simply lucky gamblers want to discover the naked truth behind the game, and frankly, we are slowly getting closer to the answer. If that is the case, then music will be the first phenomenal aspect of poker gaming around the world to receive high media hype because music can touch people's souls.

The greatest artists who ever lived on the planet can tell you that music has great impact on human brain, almost hypnotic, if I may. For instance, it can help sick people to get well, encourage children to overcome their fears, program individual success in terms of relationship or accomplish positive thinking, which is a clear psychological mark. What seems very natural to us is not a coincidence, but rather a solid theory based on years of profound research - music can program person's mood and shift it one way or the other like talented magician can make the girl appear or disappear on his command. But since we do not live in the circus, that theory must prove itself in real life.

We must see the influence of music in order to believe in it, but here comes the question skeptics would definitely ask: how can we see or recognize something unobservable, especially when it happens online or in a land based casino? I give ten percent to every skeptical question because not even one theory can be one hundred percent reliable, what leaves us with ninety percent assurance. Before I continue our discussion, I suggest you to try the following exercise: listen to your favorite song and try to think about something, the very first thing that comes into your mind. After you done that, play something that you normally dislike or turn off your TV when you hear this composition and do the thinking exercise again. I bet in the first case you thought about something nice like hot chocolate in the cold winter or your loved ones as oppose to the second time when you felt some unexplained disturbance and irritation.

The secret is very simple my friend: some type of music can bring happy emotions while other rhythms awake negative feelings. Your poker game will be directly influenced by your emotional state and result in explicit consequences. Are you ready to buy that MP3 player now and fill it with winning melodies? Before you pay your next visit to online poker room or land based casino, I suggest investing a few bucks into that little magical device, because it will take your poker game to the new levels. If peaceful melodies suggest higher level of concentration in poker room and help to prevent external disruptions, then beats loaded with negative energies will motivate aggressive behavior and players should avoid that at any cause.

Jack Reider edits reviews of online casinos , poker rooms and flash casinos but he also edits a musical theme site.

How To Get Into The Zone

2007-09-20T11:29:00.000+08:00

Alan C. Walters, an author and motivational expert, has often been "in the zone." He calls it the Golden Magic Zone.

In his book, The Secrets to Increasing Your Wealth, Power, and Happiness, he describes one of his remarkable experiences.

Once I wanted to purchase an airplane, a turbo-charged Beech Bonanza, that cost $38,000; I had $3,000.

I circled the advertisement in red ink and thought, "How am I going to turn this $3,000 into $38,000?"

An idea flashed to mind: Play Blackjack!

It was a Sunday morning. I got into my car and drove 280 miles to John Ascuga's Nugget in Sparks, Nevada, a suburb of Reno.

I sat down with two other people at a table that had a $400 a hand limit. I cashed my $3,000 for chips and bet $400 on two positions.

I played for twenty minutes and bought cards three times by double downing an ace, two, and received an eight each time.

I hit blackjack twenty-three times in twenty minutes; I had a huge pile of chips. The first time I lost a hand, I quit.

Picking up my chips and taking them to the cashier, I found I had won $58,000; I had $46,000 after taxes.

I purchased the Bonanza for $34,000, cash.

On my first flight, I blew the engine over Aurora, Oregon. Looking down, I saw a small airport. It had no radio, so I landed with great billows of black smoke pouring from the engine. I didn't know where I was, and the airport was surrounded by trees and hedges.

With several taxiways disappearing into the trees, something made me choose a taxiway toward the south end of the field.

As I taxied between those trees, I saw an old, broken-down shed. I stopped the plane in front of the shed, climbed out and walked through the front door. There I saw an elderly man putting away tools.

"Is there anyone at this airport who really understands turbo-Bonanzas?" I asked.

The man smiled. "Well," he drawled. "Up until last week, I was the foreman and head mechanic of Bonanza West, over at Portland Airport."

Amazing! (I was in the right place at the right time).

I had him replace the engine and do a complete overhaul of the plane. It cost $12,400, the exact amount I had left from my winnings. I flew that plane for ten years and never had another problem.

What are the factors that create this unique experience?

Dr. Perry Mitchell, a psychologist and public speaker, has identified some critical elements that can help anyone step into the zone.

Since what you focus on expands, you get into the zone when you naturally capitalize on your strengths and get over your mistakes quickly.

If you enjoy what you do, you will effortlessly create a momentum that can carry you into the zone, a state where you are focused, relaxed, and self-trusting.

People rarely enter the zone because they completely believe in two myths about success.

One is that to do well you have to work hard. The result of this, of course, is that since you want to do well to succeed, you believe that working harder and harder will get you closer and closer to your goal. What it does, however, is increase pressure, anxiety, and fear. Instead of doing better, you actually do worse as you fatigue and tense up.

Another myth is that pain is good. It has been particularly popularized in sports with the slogan, "no pain, no gain." Again, increasing pain results in a state of exhaustion and the cessation of effort toward your goal.

These myths are so ingrained in the collective unconsciousness that most people operate on them without even noticing them. They feel that they are not making progress unless they feel a sense of strain and effort. And they doubt if something can be good for them if it doesn't cause discomfort.

What keeps these two myths operating is what Dr. Mitchell calls the "Critical Advisor." In Freudian terms, this would be the Super-Ego. It is an ego state that is omnipresent and works on you by making you doubt anything and everything, especially your own self-worth. It is your inner map of how you should be and persistently criticizes you for not measuring up. It considers negative motivation to be necessary for your success.

To get into the zone, you have to shut off the Critical Advisor and get into the "Hands Free Zone." This term is based on an analogy. When you are riding a bicycle without holding the handlebars, you're in the "hands free zone."

When you are in the Hands Free Zone you are soaring. When you are in it, you are focused, but in a relaxed way, like a karate expert, who is both alert and relaxed enough to strike quickly at an opponent. However, once you start to notice that you are focused,
the Critical Advisor leaps in and puts you down, thus cutting off the evenly flowing psychic energy that was putting you in the zone.

The Critical Advisor has a contest mentality and a critical mentality. The contest mentality is polarity. An evaluation of whether you are good or bad, performing well or poorly. The critical mentality is the belief that you are not good enough to do it well, not worthy of accomplishment. It constantly looks at results.

Thus, the Critical Advisor operates on a polarity paradigm and a results paradigm. Since its job is to criticize you in the belief that this will steer you in the right direction (negative motivation), it cuts off any flow or zone states. You are so focused on not making a mistake that you manifest mistakes. By trying not to miss the ball flying at you, you fumble and let it slip through your fingers. By trying not to hit the lake as you make your golf swing, you send it straight into it .

The way to avoid "choking" is to turn the Critical Advisor off. You do this by being willing to consider multiple options. And you do this by focusing on the process, not the results.

If there are more than two options, then the polarity of right and wrong lose their grip on you. Similarly, if you're still in process, you can't judge results.

Doing it right is relevant to the Critical Advisor. But to the person in flow, doing it is all that matters. When you are just doing it, not worrying about whether you are good or bad at it, not concerned about results, then you are in the zone.

In the zone, you surge (enter the Hands Free Zone), recover (from the Critical Advisor), and surge again (back in the Hands Free Zone).

In relationship to time, the Critical Advisor seeks to either dominate the past or the future.
In reviewing the past, it stirs the emotion of guilt and regret. In previewing the future, it stirs the emotion of doubt and anxiety.

A person in the zone, focuses on the present, which completely removes all the negative emotions that arise from contemplating the past or the future.

There are two formulas for getting into the zone.

In the first formula, you do the following:

1. Notice what is happening right now.
2. Weigh all your options (also called the magic of the third option).
3. Learn from your experiences.
4. See what is different.

In the second formula, you do the following:

1. You perform a centering ritual. For example, a basketball player may bounce the ball three times before shooting for the net.
2. You perform a mental rehearsal. The basketball player envisions the ball arcing and flying into the center of the hoop.
3. You optimize. Turn up the volume, so to speak. Releasing the ball into the air.
4. Finally, you capitalize on what you did well. Say a loud "yes" with a clenched fist as the ball slides perfectly into the hoop. This reinforces the subconscious.

Getting into the zone is possible. But it is a skill more than just luck. And like any skill, you have to practice to get good at it.

Saleem Rana would love to share his inspiring ideas His book Never Ever Give Up tells you how. It is offered at no cost as a way to help YOU succeed. The Empowered Soul

Strategies Of The Most Successful People In The World

2007-09-18T13:28:00.000+08:00

By alvin donovan

"People are strategies waiting to be discovered."
Definition: Strategies are the particular sequence of internal and external representations that lead to a specific outcome. Human experience is an endless series of representations. To deal with this endless sequence it is useful to punctuate it in terms of outcomes.

Some major categories of strategies are excellence, decision, learning, motivation, buying and convincer.

The key to all successful persuasion is being able to "aim" or "sequence" your message at the person you are persuading in such a way that they can not say no because it is what they are already doing all of the time.

People have a naturally developed "sales/persuasion" resistance. So, your job is to elegantly present whatever you say in a way that blows right by any resistance.

In fact, it makes the person salivate to hear more and take action on what you say because it is how they normally do it all the time.

After all who normally likes to say no to themselves?
You must learn to think, talk and write in terms of process not content, to immediately become successful in persuasion.

Think of it this way, process is the direction and content is the method of travel. Obviously, if you spend all of your time concentrating on your method of travel, you will not get very far.

Questions like, "What caused..." and "How did you decide to..." will get you process information. The best ways to uncover process oriented information is to listen for it with your ears and look for it with your eyes as the person you are persuading talks. They give it to you left and right.

In fact, they cannot not give you their strategies because it is what they are doing all of the time. With practice, persons strategies will be as obvious to you as their name, clothes they are wearing etc.

General strategy elicitation and employment:
1.Determine outcome
2.See, hear, feel, make sense a movie doing it perfectly and step into it.
3.Put yourself in the optimum physiology, attitude and intention for excellence.
4.Establish rapport.
5.Check wiring.
6.Ask basic questions: "How do you decide, know etc. What happens first?"
7. Use all accessing cues: Look with your eyes and listen with your ears.
8. Calibrate.
9. Backtrack to get the next step.
10. Make sure you get a logical sequence.
11. Make sure you have all the key functional pieces.
12. Beware of your own bias toward your own strategies.
13. Elicit major representational modalities until complete.
14. Unpack criteria lists
15. Elicit and do not install: More than one option, use contrast, counter example.
16. Feedback the sequence wrong and calibrate. Take a picture.
17. Feedback the sequence right and calibrate. Take a picture.
18. Cycle for intensity and keep going for the right picture until you readily truly achieve your outcome.

Convincer strategy elicitation and employment- It is the process one goes through in their mind in order to become convinced. Once I know it and use the process and fill it in with my product or service they will buy.

Here is how it works
a) Ask "How do you know when X? i.e. How do you know when an investment is one that you will buy (sell)? What is the procedure you (or the investment committee) goes through from start to finish?

You will get one of five answers
i) see
ii) hear
iii) read about
iv) Do or feel
v) Criteria lists

Then ask
b) How many times do you need to X to convince yourself?

You will get one of four answers
i) Number of times
ii) Length of time
iii) Automatic response- right away.
iv) Consistent response- each time.

Now you- Cycle through and do it wrong, calibrate. Take a picture. Cycle through and do it right, calibrate. Take a picture. Let the correct cycle be your first PPP and keep cycling for intensity until you achieve your outcome.

Personal training tip
Instant decision to agree (buy):
Ask "When have you looked at something and knew it was absolutely right for you, it was the perfect thing for you and you have been right through the years?"

Watch where they focus their eyes and present your product at that good
convincer spot.

Hint- you might need to ask
"What was it?"

Criteria List
Without unpacking and using a persons criteria, you will never succeed in your persuasion efforts. You will discover the persons criteria in the "criteria list" step of their strategy.

Using this information will allow you to "customize" everything you say so that it has the maximal effect on that person-right then.

The reason is that the criteria list is what we use to "test" if something is a good decision or not.

Here is how to do it now:
The question to ask to elicit criteria list is:
"What is important about (here fill in the context) for you?"

EXAMPLE:
1. What is important about investments to you?
2. What is important about improving your influence skills?
3. What is important about a X you will buy?

Criteria-It is what a person uses to decide if something is good/bad etc. As he cycles through his decision process, his criteria must be met for him to make a yes decision. It is what drives a person to take action or to avoid it.

The more closely your product or service matches the person criteria that you are persuading, the more impact you will have.

For influencing purposes, the more you refer to their criteria list and link it to your product, service or proposal, the more impact you will immediately have.

Criteria, properly used, can eliminate any objection.
However, you do not stop there. Once you get the answer to the question, above, you then ask it repeatedly until you get a "hierarchy" or Criteria List of value information that will absolutely stun you as to its effectiveness.

Then, cycle through once and do it wrong, calibrate. Take a picture. Cycle through once and do it right, calibrate. Take a picture. Let the correct cycle be your first PPP keep cycling for intensity until you achieve your outcome.

Fill in the blanks with your criteria for learning this information.

The function of criteria- All criteria serves to move a person towards an objective or away from a problem. This is called, for simplicity the Towards/Away pattern. This is the basis for all motivation.

Toward- Words like: Attain, Achieve, Goals, Include; Accomplish, Solutions are what you will hear when a persons criteria is moving them toward.

Away from- Words like: Avoid, Get Away From, Evade, Exclude, are what you will hear when a persons criteria is moving them away from.

The question to ask to determine move toward/away is:

"What will having (name their criteria) do for you?"

Examples of move toward answers:
1. Q. What will having a passive income do for you?
A. It will enable me to buy more of what I want.

2. Q. What will having high quality do for you?
A. It makes me feel good knowing that I can afford the best.

3. Q. What will having superior influence skills do for you?
A. It makes accomplishing all my goals easier and faster.

Examples of move away answers:
1. Q. What will having a passive income do for you?
A. It makes sure I won't have to work when I get older.

2. Q. What will having high quality do for you?
A. It guarantees me that what I buy won't break down.

3. Q. What will having superior influence skills do for you?
A. If I have superior influence skills, I won't get told no as often.

Now, cycle through one time to calibrate that you have it. Take a picture. Let the cycle be your first PPP to link the criteria to your product and keep cycling for intensity until you achieve your outcomes.

Alvin Donovan, founder of the investment bank www.KiwiGrowthPartners.com, is the co author of Make More Money NOW and has also been a consultant/faculty member for several of the world's largest management institutes.

To Self Improve You Must Flow Like Water

2007-09-15T20:38:00.000+08:00

By Robin OBrien

Water is found in all living things but it is never contained. Somehow, somewhere it will escape and flow where it wants. To find true happiness you must allow your mind to escape and flow like water.

It was once thought that all life on earth needed 3 things: light, warmth and water, but today scientists have found living organisms deep within caves that never receive light and even bacteria buried deep in the sub-zero ice caps of Antarctica. Life doesnt need light or warmth but one thing is now known to be essential: water.

Water cannot be contained. Sooner or later it escapes and travels on a journey of its own inclination. A river flows, not in a fixed route, rather it follows the contour of the land and, if the landscape changes, the river changes course. The river follows the easiest route, the path of least resistance. Its course may change many times, it may even reach an impasse and form a lake, but eventually it finds its journeys end: the sea. Even man-made waterways, such as canals, dont contain or control water. Glass contains water but cannot keep it. If you ever look at a truly old piece of glass you can see that it has lost its smoothness: you can observe that the surface has what appears to be ripples, like ripples on a pond. The ripples always follow one direction: downward, towards gravity. A pane of glass will actually form a droplet of glass that eventually drips; it just takes a couple of thousand years to do so.

Your journey of self-improvement, to be successful, must be like that of a river. The yearning to improve your inner self is the spring from where your wide river of self-fulfilment will come.

Along the way your journey will take many turns. Youll encounter what seem to be insurmountable obstacles that loom like mountains, but like water youll find the valley or canyon to flow around the obstacles. At times the river will disappear, deep underground. Youll lose sight of it, perhaps for a long time. But, it must resurface eventually, as all rivers do before they reach journeys end.

Your journey will not always be a smooth one. Youll encounter rapids and you may even have to take enormous leaps of faith before tumbling down to where you want to be: but like a waterfall, when you reach the next step along the journey your power and energy will be many fold. You will also experience many stagnant pools along that path where the flow of the river is almost imperceptible. But flow the river does and it will flow freely and cleanly.

The journey will be a rewarding one. Your spring, that tiny step toward self-fulfilment, will turn into a river, perhaps even a great, mighty and wide one. And you wont be alone. A river is not a single entity; rather it is formed by a meeting of many springs: a meeting of minds. Your journeys end will be a confluence of water.

Dont try to constrain your river of self-development. Dont build canals to take the river where you think it should go, or aqueducts to take you over obstacles. Let the river of you journey find its own route. Can the greatest man-made canal ever compare to any river. A river moves, changes, adapts and grows bigger. The water in a canal moves slowly, the course it follows never changes, and it never will grow bigger or wider. Do you want your journey to be that of a canal or a river?

A river follows the path of least resistance. This isnt laziness: it is just expending energy where it is really needed. Your journey must explore every field, valley and wood. Dont expend energy on getting to your destination; spend your energy on exploring the world around you. All rivers eventually flow out to the sea. They all reach journeys end and you will too.

Robin O'Brien is a successfully webmaster and founder of http://www.selfimprovementtechniques.comwhere he provides help and support. You can find more self improvement tips on his site.

Create Your Own Luck And You Will Never Fail

2007-09-13T14:28:00.000+08:00

By Jaz Lai

Why is it that some people succeed at things while others fail? Is there such a thing as creating your own luck?

The answer is quite simple, those who succeed chose to 'do something' and do it now rather than later.

For example, imagine that 100 people read the exact same book that I did. I benefited from what was written and implemented the information in it to my advantage. Yet the other 100 people managed to come up with 100 different reasons why the book either wouldn't work for them or how it didn't fit their situation. The point being, everyone has choices available to him or her. They can choose to make money or choose to make excuses, its really as simple as that! People who make excuses just leave more opportunities open to those of us who do want to succeed. Those who don't sit idly by and use golden opportunities to their best advantage all have one thing in common, they just got started and don't make excuses about why they can't!

There are thousands of reasons why you can't make a start today. The timing may not be right or you may be too busy today to make a start. Most people who do succeed are usually at the busiest time of their lives, so the real question here is, are you too busy to make money? Or maybe your computer is too slow or needs updating? Possibly the software you are using isn't right to start your internet business? People like that keep telling themselves "once I get this new software or computer then I'll start.... " and go along on their merry way looking for even more plans. All the while they are waiting, they are letting golden opportunities pass them by. These people are never going to make money with that attitude because the time will never be right. So once again the real question here is when is the right time to start making money?

Others wait until every one around them is making money from working hard on a realistic plan, then call them 'lucky'? There is no such thing as being 'lucky' in this situation. We all make our own luck by taking an opportunity with both hands and 'doing something' with it! How many books have you read this year? How many ideas have you implemented from your newfound knowledge? Be truthful now! If you buy a book, make it your goal to implement at least one idea you have found.

Take some responsibility for yourself. If you don't 'do something' nobody will jump up and do it for you. By being responsible for your own success, you will find that your goals and ambitions aren't really that far from you. Ask someone who is successful and they will tell you the same thing because it's true. If you are having trouble being successful, be aware that you have the tools and opportunities. All that you need is to 'do something' about it. Create your own luck.

Jaz Lai is an Internet Business Expert where he created $10,045 sales just by sending out 5 emails without any list or product. Further recommended resources, Click here www.onlineearningmakeeasy.com/free-report

The Mind Set Of Success - In The Beginning, There Was A Thought

2007-09-12T13:38:00.000+08:00

By Richard Kimball

Thoughts are the starting point to all that we do, both good and bad, either success or failure. People underestimate the power of thought. Thoughts are things. They are energy. Every thought leaves its trace upon our minds.

What we let into our minds and hold onto governs what our circumstances and our actions are.

Each individual has the seeds of success within him. The seeds of success are the thoughts that they carry around with them. We are all the product of our own thinking and beliefs.

"Every thought seed sown or allowed to fall into the mind, and take root there, produces its own, blossoming sooner or later into act, and bearing its own fruitage of opportunity and circumstances."

James Allen As a Man Thinketh

Sustained mind control is one of the most difficult endeavors one may undertake but it is also one of the most rewarding.

Create and control your thoughts and you can become what you want to become. A person can live the way they want to live when they learn to think what they want to think.

You are what you think about most of the time. A person who is seeking success and a higher life, strives to keep their mind on the positive and the constructive. We gradually grow into what we are holding in our minds.

We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. And with our thoughts, we make our world.

Buddha

If you want to make positive changes in your life, you need to begin with what is in your mind. Our thoughts are the tools with which we build our lives.

The key is to keep your mind on the big picture and the goals leading to it. Think only of what you want, not on what you dont want.

Replace negative thinking, unproductive worrying, and thoughts of fear with positive, imaginative, and constructive thinking.

Your life is controlled by your thoughts. Your thoughts are controlled by your goals.

Earl Nightingale

A great way to keep your mind on what you want is to carry a goal card with you. The goal card lists the top goals you are working on. Just thinking of your goal, particularly, the end result, keeps your mind productive and under your control.

Keeping your mind busy with productive matters will prevent negative thoughts from creeping in.

If you fail to control your own mind, you may be sure you will control nothing else.

Napoleon Hill

Mind control is a result of self-discipline and habit. You either control your mind or it controls you.

Napoleon Hill

A controlled, focused mind pays attention to thoughts, words, actions, and plans. A person who lets their mind wander aimlessly around will never achieve lasting success.

Hold your ideal in your mind until it becomes a mental habit. Focus on it to the exclusion of all other things until it becomes a reality.

Slowly but surely, sustained positive thinking creates an irresistible momentum. People begin to notice a change in you. More opportunities come your way. You feel more confident. Gradually your outer environment begins to grow in the likeness of your inner environment.

Richard Kimball is a successful entrepreneur, artist, and teacher. His latest project is to share the universal principles of success so that others can achieve prosperity and the fulfillment of their dreams.Website: Building A Successful Life

Personal and Professional Development

2007-09-09T03:18:00.000+08:00

By Kevin Christopher

Personal and professional development is an area in which everyone needs to improve.
The most successful people continually strive to improve themselves. Personal and
professional development carries over in each aspect of your life. There are personal
skills that you may learn that will help you in professional situations. Likewise, there are
professional skills that will help you in personal situations. Anyone who is career
minded and wants to advance in their chosen field or change the field in which they are in
should look carefully into personal and professional development to see how this could
assist them in accomplishing their goals.

Personal and professional development starts with identifying the areas in which you
want to excel but currently are not. Take a long look at where you are now and where
you want to be. This is the first step in personal and professional development. Then,
discuss your goals with your employer. This is a great way to get feedback on areas of
your career. It accomplishes to goals. First, it puts your employer on notice that you
have goals and ambitions and that you are ready and willing to make changes to
accomplish those goals. It also allows you the opportunity to get valuable feedback and
possible assistance from your employer. Perhaps there are classes your boss can
recommend and ways that you can improve. This insight can be invaluable to your
personal and professional development.

Find ways to accomplish your personal and professional development. This is a great
time to look into classes that will help you advance in your career. Management courses,
motivational classes and practical advancement classes will all help you in your
professional career and you will also learn valuable tools that will transcend your
professional life and help you with your personal life as well. Personal and professional
development is a continuing process. Regularly evaluate where you are and where you
want to be and make an effort to get there by setting short term goals.

Parenting classes are a great way to assist in your personal development. However, they
also teach certain skills such as anger management, negotiation and patience that will
help in your professional life, especially in a managerial or supervisory position. Do not
discount the benefits of personal experience that can be translated into the professional
world. Often the skills learned in personal life will help you greatly in your professional.
Personal and professional development goes hand in hand. It is rare to find someone who
has it all together in their home life but is a mess in their professional life or vice versa.
Most people have specific areas that need improvement and you can see the affects of
these deficiencies in both areas of their life.

Seeing personal and professional development in your life will also instill a sense of self
worth and higher self esteem. It will give you the confidence that you need to be able to
ask for that raise or submit your application for a better job. You will begin to see your
life improving professionally, which will often lead to a more stable and worthwhile
home life. People who have a chaotic personal life will often be distracted and edgy at
work. Personal and professional development definitely is related and one area
influences the other quite often.

Kevin Christopher is a member of Success University your online personal development and motivational courses faculty. For access to personal development and motivational courses online visit Success University to continue your learning and development.

Success : A cause and effect

2007-09-07T02:28:00.000+08:00

By Dr Phil Hariram

Felix Dennis, the publishing Tycoon reckons that to be rich you need confidence and unshakeable belief. It also helps to have tunnel vision, a thick skin, stamina and a capacity for hard work.

So why is it that there are individuals who from an early age possess these qualities when most others do not? All these qualities or the opposite develop in childhood. Here are some statements I hear. I am useless at sport. I am not artistic. I cannot do that.

The feeling of insecurity so many people carry through life was developed in childhood. Lay the blame at the door of parents who knows little or nothing of child psychology. People who go through life as failures have failure instinct instilled in their minds when they were children. When a child comes into being, it is like a piece of clay placed in the hands of parents to mould as they wish. What that child will be as an adult depends largely on the input of parents. You are fortunate if your parents instilled into you self belief and a positive mental attitude that you are capable of achieving anything you put your mind to.

What about schools? They are great for the intellectual teenagers. The educational system inspires vision that nurtures their natural talents creating the environment to excel. It does not provide the same opportunities for the non-intellectuals. Many do not reach the academic level expected by the school and are deemed failures.

The fact is every individual with failure deeply ingrained in their subconscious mind can change and become the success they always wanted. Ben Sweetland said, A man may plod along for years without accomplishment when sometime unexpectedly a powerful thought will seep into consciousness and a leader is born.

If you believe you are a failure, how will you be successful? Some individuals do not believe they deserve success. Failure has become a habit. Remember the old adage, Habit is a cable. We weave a thread each day and at last we cannot break it. Do not believe this. It is nonsense. Change your belief and change your life.

Some individuals believe in luck. With my luck, it will never happen. Thomas Jefferson said, I am a great believer in luck and the harder I work the more I have of it.

The difference between success and failure is a state of mind. W. Clement Stone with $100 built a personal fortune of $100million. The great man believed in positive mental attitude. He said, There is little difference in people but that little difference makes a big difference. That little difference is attitude. The big difference whether it is positive or negative.

There is no point re-inventing the wheel. Follow the path of the great and successful icons past and present. Thomas Alva Edison never saw failure as an option. In his quest to develop the light bulb, he said, I have not failed. I just found 10,000 ways that did not work.

In the heavyweight arena, a young man burst unto the scene shouting, Im the greatest. Im the greatest. Cassius Clay, now Mohamed Ali was unknown. He had a powerful and positive belief. I'm the greatest was chiselled into his subconscious mind. He not only became the greatest boxer that ever lived but was voted the greatest athlete of the twentieth century. Did he ever have thoughts of failure? I doubt it.

Have belief. Use a positive belief system as the cornerstone to propel you to where you want to be.

Visualise what you want to do or be. Create motivation that stimulates momentum. Then take action. Success will be your. The stronger your belief, the greater will be your success.

Always keep Napolean Hills statement at the forefront of your mind, Anything the mind can conceive and believe the mind can achieve.

Dr. Phil Hariram is a representative of Success University. He started life in Guyana. Overcoming several obstacles, he was accepted into Glasgow University to study Medicine. He had a dream. He made it come true. So can you. www.no1homebasedbusinesssuccess.com

The Ultimate Keys to Success

2007-09-05T02:28:00.000+08:00

Copyright 2006 Cedric Licuanan

There are only 4 steps to fulfilling happiness and success.

1) Specialized Education and Knowledge

The first step is to acquire specialized education, knowledge, and training in the field that you intend to succeed.

LEARN TO SUCCEED.

In other words, you must LEARN first, in order to SUCCEED next. Your mind and knowledge must ALWAYS grow upwards. Once we stop learning, we die mentally.

Someone tells you to build a house. So what do you do? Where do you start? The mentality of an unsuccessful person might cause them to respond, 'I can't build a house, I've never done it before, and I don't know how.'

However, the mentality of a successful person will cause them to respond, 'How can I build this house? Although I've never done it before, where can I start learning how?'

It all boils down to an extremely powerful 3-word question:

'HOW CAN I?'

Basically, a successful person will find a way to 'Figure it out.' He or she will do what it takes to acquire the specialized education and knowledge used in the house building and construction industry, and figure out, 'How can I?'

The successful person will also leverage his or her time by tapping into the knowledge of other successful people in the industry, hopefully experts in the house construction field. They say, 'No man is an island', or 'Two heads are better than one.'

As the successful person works on acquiring the assistance of other successful people, the otherwise daunting task of building and constructing a house is well on its way, while the unsuccessful person didn't even get the task off the ground.

Quite a difference that three-word question makes, doesn't it?

Not 'I CAN'T!', but instead 'HOW CAN I?'

'Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one.' - Malcolm Forbes

2) Specific Goals

The second step is to commit to specific, attainable, time-bound goals. As soon as you commit to your goals, it is important to simply share your goals with a supportive loved one.

Everybody talks about goals, and goal setting. There is an incredible amount of material on the purpose and reasoning for setting goals. There is just a tremendous amount of information available about goals, but the most important ideas that stand are as follows:

'SMART'

Specific: Your goals must not be too general, and broad. Make your goals laser targeted and targeted.

Measurable: Your goals should be able to be benchmarked and calculated.

Attainable: Your goals should be obtainable and achievable within reason.

Reasonable: Your goals should be appropriate and consistent with the future that you have planned.

Time-Bound: Your goals should have a deadline - not just 'whenever I feel like it'.

You MUST have a burning desire in order to successfully attain your goals. Too many people have shortchanged themselves and their lives by setting goals for themselves, and not following through with those goals. That 'burning desire' does not seem to exist for certain goals that we set in our lives, heck I'm guilty of that same sin! However, with a strong burning desire, anybody could accomplish any goal that they set their mind's to.

No more excuses! 'If it has to be, it is up to me'. You have to take ownership and responsibility for your life. You have to stop the Blame Game.

The two main obstacles to setting goals is your personal Fear and Doubt. You may fear that you may fail, and therefore doubt that you could overcome these obstacles towards success.

F.E.A.R. = False Evidence Appearing Real. Doubt is the EXACT opposite of faith.

Avoid these 2 obstacles AT ALL COSTS!

Write down your Goals on Paper! 'I will.....' Always have your SMACT goals written down, easily viewable every single day. Review them first thing in the morning, during the day, and finally right before you go to bed.

Review your goals daily!

'Repetition is the Mother of Skill'. The repetition that gets accomplished when you focus on your goals every single day is incredibly powerful.

Use Visualization!

Always close your eyes and picture yourself actually achieving your goals. Picture the reward that you will receive as well as do everything that you can to pretend to 'feel' that incredible sense of accomplishment. Try to mentally connect that feeling with a sense of accomplishment of the past.

'What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals.' -Zig Ziglar

'You control your future, your destiny. What you think about comes about. By recording your dreams and goals on paper, you set in motion the process of becoming the person you most want to be.' -Mark Victor Hansen

3) Focused Persistent Planned Action

The third step is to set up an action plan with FOCUSED PERSISTENT ACTION towards your goals. 'Plan your work, and then work your plan'. Start out with baby steps at first, then work your way up to large strides. Everyone starts somewhere!

The single most characteristic that is DIRECTLY related to success is Persistence. The ability to continue moving forward regardless of the obstacles placed in front of you is the essence of the characteristic of Persistence.

Every person has a limit to how much resistance they could handle before giving up, and the main difference between the successful and the unsuccessful is the amount of resistance that a person is willing to endure.

If Persistence is the number one action taken towards extreme success, the unfortunate action of giving up too quickly is the number one reason for dramatic failure. For example, imagine yourself taking part in a long-distance run in your city. At the very first sign of fatigue, you have 2 simple decisions: 1) You give up and stop now 2) You persist and continue forward.

If you chose the first decision.....well, there's not much to be said about this first decision. If you did not finish the race, then unfortunately you have to chalk this one up as a failure.

However, if you chose the second decision, your chances for success just dramatically increased.

MA=MR MASSIVE ACTION = MASSIVE RESULTS

'The race goes not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running.' -Anonymous

'Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.' -Dale Carnegie

'Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.' -Thomas Alva Edison

4) Excellence

The final step is to do what you do extremely WELL. If you are going invest the time and effort taking action towards your goals, you might as well try to be good at what you do. Heck, why not become an expert at it also? When a person stands out in the crowd as well-known 'expert', AMAZING things happen in their lives!

Being able to excel at something is usually due to either progressive repetition, or pure talent.

When a person starts to succeeding in business, she notices that if all she did was focus on the characteristic of Excellence, she would succeed indefinitely.

Whenever she found herself having some down time: Waiting in line, waiting for the movie to start, commercial breaks on TV, etc. She would simply take out my wallet and read this document. This tiny act would literally take only 20 seconds, but it helped her TREMENDOUSLY. When your brain and mind gets exposed to positive messages repetitively, eventually the message sinks in. You want to have this 'Excellence Mindset' in all that you do. You want to be able to be able to excel and succeed in all the tasks of a successful person.

Become an Expert It is VERY important to 'become the Expert' in your particular industry. You want to be able set up a reputation for yourself as the 'go to' person. In other words, other people in your chosen industry always seem to turn to you with their questions and concerns, etc.

'Excellence is the result of caring more than others think is wise; risking more than others think is safe. Dreaming more than others think is practical and expecting more than others think is possible.' -Anonymous

'Excellence is never an accident: it is the result of high intention, sincere effort, intelligent direction, skillful execution and the vision to see obstacles as opportunities.' -Unkown

'Excellence is the gradual result of always striving to do better.' -Pat Riley

In Summary, 1) Do everything you can to attain the specialized education and knowledge in your field 2) Set specific goals and timelines 3) Put your goals and plans into PERSISTENT ACTION and finally 4) Do what you can to EXCEL in your activities!

Utilize the 4 Ultimate Keys to Success in ALL your endeavors, and get ready for an incredible ride in the months and years ahead!

Cedric Licuanan is a thriving Chicago-Based Internet Marketer. He has focused on helping people achieve what they want out of life and currently maintains several success-driven websites. Learn How to Drive Massive Amounts of Targeted Traffic to Your Website! http://www.dynamiconlinesuccess.com/ http://www.dynamicwealthnow.net/

Yes, You Can Achieve Your Impossible Dream

2007-09-03T02:39:00.000+08:00

By Jim DeSantis

Achieving a level of success, a level we can be comfortable with personally, varies with expectations and goals.

Often we compare our level of success with that of someone we admire or, in fact, someone we envy. We want what they have. We want to be where they are in life. We want it NOW!

This desire is what fuels public fascination with celebrities. They seem to live the abundant life of fame and fortune. What is not seen is their struggles to get there and stay there.

Someone once said - "Overnight success takes about 15 years." It might not take you that long depending upon the level of success you are trying to achieve and how many obstacles you must overcome. My own story is a case in point.

I was a factory worker when a chance meeting opened a door that would change my life. But, like any success story, I had to go through the door and be prepared to work towards success. I had to overcome many obstacles, many put there by others in broadcasting because I did not follow the traditional path they chose to follow. I appeared to be an overnight success, success handed to me on a silver platter.

My co-workers in the factory laughed at me, yet, within 9 months I was on Radio as a News Anchor/Reporter. Within two years I was a Television News Anchor. Within three years I was News Director/Anchor and I have won numerous journalism and community awards. I have interviewed the famous and the infamous. Not bad for a kid from the "across the tracks". Actually, the tracks were right across the street, fronting a steel mill, and the fence to a plastics plant was three feet from our side door.

I'll never forget the owner of the corner store. He told me - "you're a little bum...you're gonna end up in jail". He was still alive to see me Anchor the local TV News. Sweet.

My success was hard work but it was fun at the same time. How did I do it?

First, I was too dumb to figure out why I couldn't have my dream come true.

Second, I ignored negative people and focused on positive role models in books, in movies, and in my community.

If you want to be successful in a certain field, copy someone who is already successful in that field. Find out what they know and do it, without question.

Become too dumb to figure out why it won't work.

I copied Walter Cronkite and, years later, I would sit and talk with him, professional journalist-to-professional journalist, twice. Sweet.

Enough about me. Take a look at this young man:

Failed in Business - Bankruptcy.

Defeated for Legislature one year later.

Sweetheart/Fiancee Dies three years later.

Nervous Breakdown one year later.

Defeated in Election in the same year.

Defeated for U.S. Congress seven years later.

Defeated again for U.S. Congress three years later.

Defeated once again for U.S. Congress two years later.

Defeated for U.S. Senate seven years later.

Defeated for U.S. Vice President one year later.

Defeated again for U.S. Senate two years later.

After 29 years of obstacles he was elected President of the United States.

These were the struggles of President Abraham Lincoln!

If you had been faced with that many obstacles, would you have quit somewhere along the way?

In your own journey towards success, are you ready to quit because someone has convinced you that you can't do it?

Have you ever quit because someone convinced you that you were nuts?

Has anyone ridiculed your efforts, laughed at you, told you that youll never amount to anything?

Remember Abraham Lincoln and keep at it!

I did. You can too.

Jim DeSantis runs On Line Tribune Self Help Newspaper packed with Free articles, courses, and ebooks on a variety of topics. You are invited to submit your opinion on this or on any other topic to Jim's blog. If accepted, your opinion will be published as a Featured Article.

Make Success Your Priority

2007-09-01T13:28:00.000+08:00

By Audrey Burton

Overwhelm, distractions and the inability to say NO keep many people from achieving their potential. Too many opportunities paralyzes your ability to make the right decisions; Email prevents focus. Guilt and 'shoulds' keep us busy with activities that fill our days, but do not get us closer to success!

We are not machines, so these things will happen. The key is to prioritize what you will allow to use your time. What is most important to you?

We read stories in Oprah's magazine and see on TV all these women who start multi-million dollar businesses while raising their 4 kids and their sister's 3 kids and all while volunteering at the school. Don't be fooled! You do not have the same life nor the same opportunities.

Here is what we don't see - her mom helps take care of the kids and cooks and cleans, her husband fronted the money, she didn't get more than 3 hours of sleep a night for 6 years, or her kids are completely out of control. Her priorities are not the same as yours and mine. Avoid comparing yourself to others - it is a dangerous trap, and you never know all the facts!

What are your priorities?

For me, raising my two girls as a single/only parent to be responsible, caring, contributing adults is my top priority. A distant second, is growing my business to a place where I work less and make more, and have lots of money for my retirement. Without raising my kids the way I want, it wouldn't matter how much money I had, I would be miserable. Besides, they will grow up and I will have a shift in my priorities then.

Setting your priorities is a very personal process. The big things are fairly easy; it's the every day stuff that becomes challenging. For example, I see many people who get asked to volunteer and say yes again and again, even though they know it delays the achievement of their goals. The little voice in their heads says, "Don't do it this time!", but they find themselves saying yes.

One of the hidden reasons behind this sometimes is that she wants to have a good excuse for not achieving her goals. "I've been so busy at the school/the networking group/the chamber of commerce, that I just couldn't build my business the way I wanted!"

Setting priorities is the first step. Put them on paper, then flesh out an action plan to accomplish your goals. For example, if it is your goal to exceed $50,000 in revenues this year, you will need to detail how you plan to do this, and get to work. The money will not fall in your lap, and you're not getting any younger! Once you have put your plan on paper, put it where you can see it and review it regularly.

When a new opportunity presents itself (that will absorb your time), delay your decision for an hour or a day - whatever time you have. Really think strategically - will this get me closer to my success as I have defined it? What will the benefit be and what will it cost in time and money if I say yes?

If you aren't making money right now, that needs to be your priority over long-term gains. You do need to keep longer term goals in mind, but don't find yourself spending all your resources on future gains - future gains won't pay the electric bill! Analyze opportunities as they present themselves:
1. How will this benefit me and my family in the short term?
2. Long term?
3. What will this cost me in the short and long terms?
4. What is that little voice in my head telling me?

Sometimes, you have to do the 'right thing'. If you are in debt and not taking care of yourself and your family properly, buck up and get a job. Pay off the debt and save your money so you can try starting your business later without being desperate.

Trust your inner wisdom, but at the same time, ask your 'trusted advisors'. Keep in mind that some of your advisors have their own agendas, and have a vested interest in the result.

Bottom Line: Having specific, written priorities keeps you focused on your plan, and helps you say NO when you need to!

Audrey Burton is a practical Small Business Coach. She eliminates business/marketing overwhelm and gets you excited to work on your business again! To sign up for her free, monthly email newsletter, visit her site: www.TigressCoaching.com

The Power Of Our Subconscious Mind

2007-08-28T13:38:00.000+08:00

By Richard Kimball

Have you ever fully appreciated that marvelous tool for success that each and every one of us has at our command? It is our mind.

Theodore Roosevelt

All the resources we need are in the mind.

In the novel Terminal Man by Michael Crichton, it mentions that at that time (1972) the largest and most expensive computer had the same number of circuits as the brain of an ant. To make a computer with the capacity of the human brain would require the size of a huge skyscraper. Its energy demand would be the equivalent of a city of a half a million.

I know computers have come a long way since 1972 but it shows the tremendous capacity of the human mind.

Did you know our conscious mind is only one-sixth of our brains thinking and power? Our subconscious mind represents five-sixths of our thinking and power.

The whole mind, conscious and subconscious, possesses the power to solve any problem that may come up, or provide the necessary ways and means through which we can achieve our ends.

The conscious mind holds only about 7 pieces of information in short-term memory. Your sub-conscious mind, however, stores all the knowledge you have ever acquired. Everything you have ever read, heard, thought or imagined is held within its immense memory.

Brain researchers estimate that your unconscious mind outweighs the conscious on a scale of ten million to one. This is the source of your hidden, natural genius. In other words, this part of you is much smarter than you think you are. This is where the great artists, writers, and poets to get their inspiration.

Albert Einstein

The intellect has little to do on the road to discovery. There comes a leap in consciousness, call it intuition or what you will, and the solution comes to you, and you dont know how or why.

I am enough of an artist to draw freely upon my imagination. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world.

The subconscious mind is useful in two ways. The first way involves receiving information, solving problems, and receiving inspiration.

The second way deals with programming your mind to supercharge your confidence, your self-image, and your desired beliefs. This can take a little time at first but like many things gets easier with practice.

Programming your subconscious works best through visualization. Pictures and symbols are by far the most effective way of impressing your subconscious. Speaking of symbols and pictures, this is why dreams are largely symbolic in nature. While you sleep your mind processes information and presents it back in the form of symbolic pictures.

Whats great about your subconscious mind is that it never rests. Whatever goal or problem you give your subconscious, it will work on continually, day or night.

Whatever you think and ponder about deeply with strong emotion makes a strong impression on your subconscious. This is why you also need to be careful. Excessive worrying and negative self-talk can also make strong impressions.

You want your subconscious mind to be a goal achieving, success mechanism, not a failure mechanism.

Richard Kimball is a successful entrepreneur, artist, and teacher. His latest project is to share the universal principles of success so that others can achieve prosperity and the fulfillment of their dreams. Website: Building A Successful Life

Discover The Six Traits Of Successful People

2007-08-26T01:28:00.000+08:00

By Monica Willyard

Have you ever wondered why successful people seem to turn everything they touch into gold while you seem to be stuck with a pocketful of lead? Do you tell yourself that they must have been born with more money, better looks, and a better education than you? Even as you comfort yourself with this line of thought, do you find yourself pushing away the knowledge that people like Ogg Mandino and Zig Ziglar were dirt poor and that Dave Thomas never graduated from high school?

I have spent most of my adult life studying the lives of people who are successful in life and in business because I wanted to be one too. My discoveries parallel those of Napoleon Hill, Robert Allen, and Thomas J. Stanley, 3 men who have also spent many years studying the habits of successful people. Here are six traits that successful people share, traits you can learn and develop for yourself.

1. Successful people are dedicated learners, most of them reading for hours each day. They seem to know intuitively that continuing to learn about the world and other people is part of what lets them be creative and make sound decisions.

2. Successful people have a burning desire to accomplish the thing they are working on. It's more than a passing fancy, more intense than a dream, and is more focused than a goal. It is a melding of logic, emotion, and the spirit. Do you remember when you fell in love for the first time? That intensity is a component of burning desire.

3. Successful people develop highly specialized knowledge. They are experts in their chosen field and have learned every aspect of their field or niche. Though they do read and learn about other subjects, successful people become deeply involved in their chosen field and are rewarded for their expertise.

4. Successful people are disciplined. They use discipline to keep themselves focused, and they count on discipline to get them through hard times when they may be discouraged emotionally. Discipline gives them the self-control to do the things that aren't very much fun but must be done if their project is to succeed. I read somewhere that successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do. I like that saying because it doesn't say that successful people necessarily like doing what unsuccessful people aren't willing to do. It just means that they get the thing done and keep moving.

5. Successful people tend to have a decisive nature. They are able to make most decisions fairly quickly and don't second guess themselves once a choice is made. They take full responsibility for their choices, whether the decision was the right one or not.

6. Successful people surround themselves with other successful people and people who have a can-do attitude. This is what people are referring to when they talk about a mastermind group. They network with other people and turn to successful people for encouragement when times are hard. They seem to actively avoid working with people who are habitually negative. They do their brainstorming with a carefully chosen mastermind group, and they don't let negative people steal their dreams.

Look over this list of traits of successful people. How many of them do you see in your life? What can you do to encourage development of these traits in your life? If you don't have one, what could you do to develop a mastermind group of your own?

Monica Willyard trains home business champions. She provides personal mentoring combined with a road-tested game plan that gets results. Want to know more?
Surf over to http://www.clarion-jayde-publishing.com/ today.

7 Timeless Secrets for Success

2007-08-20T02:28:00.000+08:00

Copyright 2006 Colleen Kettenhofen

If your actions create a legacy that inspires others to dream more, learn more, do more, and become more, then you are an excellent leader. Dolly Parton

1. When you love what you do, its not work, it energizes you. Whether you want to start a business, or achieve overall greater business success, you must start with a burning desire. There will be roadblocks and detours along the way. Without the fuel of passion and feeling of purpose, its easy to become overwhelmed, lose focus and give up entirely. When I was in sales, I loved going to work and having that customer connection. The only reason I eventually left was I possessed an even greater passion for connecting through speaking, training and writing. Theres a strong sense of accomplishment for me at the end of a speaking engagement when people report that they feel a newfound sense of control. They say they cant wait to implement the proven techniques to resolve issues such as dealing with a difficult person or employee, overcoming procrastination, or improving their public speaking skills and achieving greater business success. Often, people who are close to finding their dream simply need to fine tune it. Consider seeing a career counselor so you can channel your passion.

2. Achieving greater business success means practicing delayed gratification and greater discipline. It is said that many people starting a business or making a career change would do better to rent for a while and not have the added expense of a mortgage. A key trait of successful people is the ability to see things from a long-term perspective. Get rid of extra things and frivolous expenses that are holding you back. It may be important for you to surround yourself with a team of experts such as a reliable accountant, attorney, motivation coach, financial planner, and possibly a graphic artist and web designer. Put simply, successful people often make themselves do things that others dont want to do.

3. Clarify your core values. Make sure your goals are consistent with whats important to you. Otherwise, no matter how much you think you want something, you wont work hard to achieve it. Write down every personal and professional goal you think you want to accomplish. Make sure theyre realistic. Ask yourself if each one is consistent with giving you greater peace of mind and happiness. For example, if freedom and staying home with your children is important to you, will this new job allow you to do that? If not, no matter how high paying it is, it wont matter. Youll find excuses for procrastinating and not doing it. So start clarifying your values.

4. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Research shows we will do more to avoid pain than to get pleasure. Theres a strong correlation between fear and procrastination. Often we procrastinate something because deep down we associate that activity or goal with some type of pain. For example, I know of a colleague who procrastinated starting what is now a very successful business out of concern shed exceed her husband financially. The business has proven so successful the husband now works for her. He says she is easier to be around because shes fulfilling a creative need. Not to mention the added security of more family income. In order to be successful, whether it's entering into a new relationship or achieving greater business success, sometimes you have to be willing to be terrified.

5. Learn to overcome procrastination. A key ingredient for success is overcoming procrastination. Research shows its usually the harder tasks that we dont want to do that are imperative in helping us achieve our goals. Break down each task or project into baby steps. To avoid overwhelm, avoid saying to yourself, Im going to sit down and work on this for the next four hours straight. Instead, say, Ill work on this first thing tomorrow morning from just 8:30 a.m. until 9:15 a.m. Then, if I want to stop I will. During this time, we often end up on a roll and want to keep going. The hardest part is getting started.

Once you are on a roll, whatever you do, dont stop until your task is 100% complete. Research points to the fact that its much harder to start a task, stop, and then try to pick it up again. Keep in mind that everything you procrastinate today only compounds tomorrows pressure. To be motivated toward your goal requires you to have strong motive and get moving.

6. Accept responsibility. Once you know what you want to achieve, whether it's personal success or business success, recognize that you and you alone are responsible for making it happen. Take responsibility for the choices youve made in the past. You cant control many external circumstances around you, such as other people or their opinion of you, but you can control your thoughts and your environment. Remember the saying, What other people think of you is none of your business!

7. Take action, write down your goals, and commit them to someone supportive. Make them specific, measurable and realistic. Next to each goal, write down one action step you can take today to bring you closer to accomplishing it. Share them with someone supportive. Give them specific time frames (the date and the time) for when you are going to take these action steps. Have them check up on you for accountability. Holding yourself accountable is a central key to success. Keep a written copy of your goals in your wallet and look at them every day. Subconsciously your mind will start coming up with ideas for achieving your goals. When you get these ideas, write them down immediately. Youll begin attracting into your life people and circumstances that can get you there.

Keep in mind that whats going on outside you is a result of whats going on INSIDE you. What self-limiting belief do you have about your skills and abilities? Take stock and be honest with yourself. The average person has 50,000 to 60,000 thoughts a day. When we talk to ourselves about ourselves, much of that self-talk is negative. We are usually our harshest critic. As the saying goes, How many times in a day do we should all over ourselves with everything that we should be doing?! Always rememberstrive for progress, not perfection.

Success is relative. It is what we can make of the mess we have made of things. T.S. Eliot

Colleen Kettenhofen is a motivational speaker, workplace expert, co-author of "The Masters of Success," as featured on the Today Show, along with Ken Blanchard and Jack Canfield. To order the book, or for more free articles and free newsletter visit www.ColleenSpeaks.com or call (800)323-0683. Popular topics: leadership, management, difficult people, public speaking, success. You are free to repost or reprint this article provided Colleen Kettenhofen's name and website are included. www.ColleenSpeaks.com

How the TV Show "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire" Teaches You to Be Successful

2007-08-18T01:39:00.000+08:00

By David W Johnson

Ive never watched the TV program Who Wants to Be a Millionaire but I realize it teaches a valuable lesson on how to become successful.

The premise of the show seems simple enough. Youre asked a multiple-choice question and if you answer correctly, you win the stated dollar amount. If you want to continue and win more, you risk the amount won so far. The game ends when youve won $1 million, or you stop playing, or you answer the question wrong and lose all your winnings.

The interesting part of the game is the questions asked are more difficult to answer at each level to the $1 million. Success in any endeavor works the same way. Youll have harder challenges to solve as you get closer to achieving your goals.

Success comes in all shapes and sizes. Who Wants to Be a Millionaire shows that easy questions earn small rewards and harder questions deserve bigger rewards.

Success however has one undeniable and often rejected natural law It aint easy.

Read any biography of a successful person and theyll tell you of the challenges they faced on their journey to success. Few had it easy and the rest had to prove they were worthy of receiving success.

Funny thing about natural law, it sometimes doesnt follow its own rule. Every once in a while someone gets a pass and success happens easily.

How pointless would Who Wants to Be a Millionaire be if every question to $1 million could be answered by a 5-year old? How apathetic would you become if you never failed?

You might be saying to yourself, If I had Bill Gates money, I wouldnt mind a little apathy.

Did I tell you apathy also has its own natural law Dont make me hurt you. It will put challenges purposely in front of you. Face the challenge and everything is possible. Ignore the challenge and suffer the consequence.

Without challenge, success is meaningless. This is why the audience cheers-on the contestant, everyone dreams of being their personal hero, and you keep getting up in the morning to take another stab at it.

Achieve success sooner with education, association and participation. For more information and our FREE report "Wealth Building and Success Here's Your First Step!", go to www.quest4u.cc

Your Motivation for Success

2007-08-13T02:28:00.000+08:00

By Liane Bate

If you are someone who follows my article posts, you may have noticed that I haven't written so many lately...Why? Okay, excuse time! It's summertime, I love the sun, being outdoors, and being active, and this has been one of our very few heat-wave type summers! No, that doesn't mean I have lost my motivation to be successful at my online business, but let's face it, we all go through ups and downs, productive times and unproductive times - and this maybe isn't my most productive time of year. Maybe it's a good thing I live in Canada where there are four seasons and not just one hot, sun-sizzling summer year round! Yes, I am truly blessed to be where I am. As much as I love the outdoors and enjoying the beauty and solitude of the Rocky Mountains, I also have a pretty strong work ethic that makes me want to be the best I can be at the online business that I have started. At times like these it is tough to stay motivated, but that's precisely when you have to take charge of your self and the direction you are headed.

A lot of motivation has to do with your attitude about yourself, your life, and your direction. You know what I'm going to say...If it's the pits, then so is your level of motivation. Attitude is not only about the state of mind you are in - it's also about taking action. You not only have to think what it takes, you have to do what it takes to get your desired results. What some people don't realize is that a lot of what it takes to have a positive attitude is all about self-maintenance. Taking care of your physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, and intellectual self is the key to maintaining a healthy attitude that leads to success. Simply having an awareness of what motivates, challenges, and inspires you can give you the energy and passion you need to do what it takes.

I know it's not easy to always stay positive. Truth be known, I have always been very strong, but never the perfect model of positive thinking. I am working on it though, and the more I learn about success, internet marketing, and personal development, the more I feel changes taking place within me that feel good and that I know are steps in the right direction. It's important to engage yourself in continuous, life-long learning in any area that interests you. But when you make an investment in yourself and your success, then you are doing yourself a huge favor.

You never really become a true master of yourself as things change, people change, and circumstances change. That's why learning is a life-long process. Once it stops, you stop growing, and when you stop growing, you are stuck with negativity, which always finds a way of sneaking in and taking hold of you. So keep your learning in check, and keep yourself in check. When you have mastered this concept, then you can take things a step further by realizing the importance of giving something to others, or making a contribution. When you do things for other people, you have found a cause greater than yourself, and this can only make you better.

Be sure to know why you are doing what you are doing. It may be tedious to write down what you want out of life, but when you have it in writing, you can read it over and over again when times get tough, as a reminder of what you're shooting for. Our minds can be nasty sometimes - flooding us with negative thoughts that can completely take over. We need constant reminders, just like a refresher course they offer in schools. Even though we already know the concepts and know what it takes, how we have to think, and what to do, there are just too many outside influences that affect our thinking, and our attitudes. Writing what we want down on paper, and keeping it in front of us where we can read it often will help us stay focused, motivated and successful. This article is my partial written word of inspiration to keep me learning and motivated. I hope it helps you too!

Liane Bate owns a Plugin Profit Site web business, and is a member of Success University. Learn more about motivation at: www.HonestMoneyMaking.com

How to Turn Fear into Success

2007-08-11T02:18:00.000+08:00

By Terence Young

Fear can be a healthy emotion. When a person is completely fearless, such as a person who is experiencing a manic episode, they can gamble away the family's life savings or risk their life and honor in foolish behavior. There is a natural aspect of fear that protects us from disaster. On the other hand, fear can keep us from success. While natural caution is a good thing, there is also a place for taking a risk, especially when you are seeking to gain success.

Some common fears are those that involve other people. Extreme shyness, for example, is really much like a fear of other people. Shy people might be afraid that others will reject them or dislike them. Another people fear that many people have is that of public speaking. Oddly, many people who are not afraid in a one-on-one people situation can be paralyzed by the thought of speaking before a group. In fact, public speaking often ranks first on surveys of common fears people have.

Being bold and brave around people, whether one-on-one or before a group, is a necessary element of success. If you have people fears to overcome, keep this in mind. In many ways, a person who is shy is actually a better candidate for success than the bold extrovert. Why is this so? It is because the shy person often has more of an awareness and even respect for others than the extrovert.

We've all met the pushy salesman type of person, who seems to have absolutely no respect for us as an individual but only wants what he or she can get from us. If you have a respectful fear of people, you won't become this type of businessperson! However, the flip side of this is that your fear might be rooted in an unrealistically negative opinion of yourself.

Think about your fear of people. Is it because you respect them or because you don't have a very good view of yourself? Here is a nugget of wisdom that can even be found in the Bible. Don't compare yourself with others. The Good Book says that when we compare ourselves among ourselves we are not wise. Everyone has good points and bad points. Instead of comparing yourself with someone else, try comparing yourself to who you were yesterday.

The other fear that can hinder your success is the fear to take a risk. This can be a fear of failure or a fear of the unknown. Maybe you're even a little afraid of success! Are those risky events as big a risk as not taking a chance on success? Think about it. Doing nothing is risky, too. If you really want to be a success and reach your deepest goals and dreams, you will have to step out and take action someday. In fact, today is the day.

Risk taking gets easier with practice. You might have to give yourself a big shove to take the first scary step toward success, but the next step shouldn't be quite so scary. If it is, just keep stepping. Many people have overcome their fears through positive thought processes and facing those fears head-on. Don't let fear keep you from success.

For more personal growth articles visit: www.personalgrowthunlimited.com

Integrity and Prosperity

2007-08-09T01:38:00.000+08:00

Copyright 2006 Daniel Sitter

The word integrity is passed around a lot. Many people use it without proper reflection upon what it encompasses. It is bantered about as a much more casual word might be. Why is that? Could it be that its far easier to use the word that it is to live by it? A life guided by integrity is certainly not a rare occurrence, but one that when observed, yields a sense of completeness, harmony and prosperity that transcends more than just the monetary.

Websters dictionary defines integrity as firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values and describes a person of integrity as incorruptible. I prefer a much more simplified and applicable definition that can touch each of us wherever we are: Integrity is what you do and how you behave when there is no one watching. Of course, I believe that there is always a righteous God watching. However, there are certainly those persons that are not as concerned about that fact as they might well be, but that is a topic for another day.

How does integrity relate to prosperity? After all, they are not mutually exclusive. Its really quite simple we reap what we sow. Man was given a conscience to act as a moral compass, a barometer, constantly receiving feedback from our thoughts and actions and then responding back to us with guidance. If we sow with integrity, we will also reap in abundance. Our reputation will grow and we will discover that we are the type of person that others will seek out to have business transactions with. This will grow exponentially and our prosperity is assured. The prosperity I speak of here is also one of peace, harmony, satisfaction, fulfillment as well as the monetary reward.

Some time ago, I came across a paper entitled Ten Affirmations of Integrity on which there was no mention of the author. These affirmations are simple, yet so very profound. Read them now and again each morning as you wake and again each evening as you prepare for sleep. Internalize them and you will certainly prosper.

1. When I make a promise, I will keep that promise.How many times do people say something or make a promise that they have absolutely no intention of ever keeping? Do you ever catch yourself saying something to someone just to shut them up, simply telling them what they want to hear?

2. When I set a goal, I will work to achieve it.Would you believe that most of us do not have any written goals? Most people have dreams or wants that they simply keep in their heads. These thought are fleeting and often tend to morph into new ideas or wants on a frequent basis like the winds. Learn to write down your goals and identify the steps necessary to achieve them. Review them daily and track your progress. It only takes a few minutes to do, but most of us will not bother.

3. I will treat others as I would treat myself.The golden rulewhere have we heard that before! This one is a gold mine ready to be enjoyed. Simply treat others with dignity and respect. You will certainly stand out in the crowd.

4. I will conduct my life with excellence.Commit to living your life as if you were always being scrutinized. The word shortcut is not even in your vocabulary. See things completely through by creating mental pictures of your goal. Do your very best always. Finish what you start. Never quit and never give up. Always look to uplift others with a kind word or action.

5. I will be personally accountable.Realize that you are responsible for you. There is no blame or credit to be blanketed on others. Stand on your personal word. Mean what you say and do what you mean to. Take pride in doing the small things that make a big difference. Dont ever be afraid to admit you might be wrong. When wrong, make it right. Take a stand.

6. I will face my mistakes and grow from them.Everyone makes mistakes. The key point is that we should always strive to eliminate the possibility of making the same mistake twice. We do that by examining our mistake, determining the reason for it and where we went off course. Gather as much insight as possible from the situation and make note of what you would do differently when the same opportunity comes your way again. Admit your mistakes. Learn from them.

7. I will relate to others with honesty.Be honest with yourself and your dealings with others. Dont ever justify a lie by calling it a stretch of the truth or a white lie that wont hurt anyone. You will soon find yourself telling another lie to conceal the first one and so on. It is always best to tell the truth. Most people will respect you for it, even if you were wrong. Strength of character is forged from honesty and respect.

8. I will show respect for authority.Everyone is subject to someone or something. We teach our children to respect their parents, grandparents, teachers, leaders, crossing guard and other adults in their lives. In the same way, we as adults need to respect the authority of others, especially while on their turf. Remember that the next time you are in the library or the movie theater when someone far younger than you asks you to please be quiet or turn off your cell phone.

9. I will honor my debts.We live in a disposable culture. This has stretched well beyond mere things to include institutions such as marriage and family. How many commercials currently parade across our televisions promising debt relief or financial freedom? Shakespeare said neither a borrower nor a lender be and he was right. There is no running out on accumulated debt while maintaining honor. If necessary, sit down with a financial expert and design a plan to gradually work your way out of debt. A winner will always honor his debts, sleeping peacefully in the process.

10. I will love people and use things.

People are not pawns to be manipulated for personal gain, but that is exactly how some of us treat others if it will benefit us in some way. People of integrity will always seek to build up others, edifying them and encouraging them to victory. People lacking integrity selfishly seek their own agenda without concern for anyone else. This is not how we were designed by our Creator to interact with each other. We are interdependent beings, not isolated islands.

Integrity is a trait most admired by winners. It is such a quality in man that it is eagerly sought out by employers, diplomats, teachers, negotiators, pastors and many others. Given a choice of several similarly talented individuals from which there will be a single job awarded, the person of integrity will most likely stand out and be awarded that employment. In a leadership arena, such as an emergency situation, where someone must surely take charge, the person of integrity will rise to the occasion and will quickly garner the respect of those around her, allowing for her leadership to take over. Her integrity will ensure her leadership because those around her will sense her discerning abilities.Integrity, of course, will not absolutely guarantee prosperity, but I submit that people of integrity sleep better, work more efficiently and attract a more qualified and capable inner circle of friends and associates from whom they gather advice, recommendations and counsel. This cabinet of leaders and qualified experts will almost always ensure their success at most any endeavor they undertake. Integrity is a critical yardstick by which we will be judged by our peers, our critics and our God. It is an ideal where we cannot afford to fall short.

Daniel Sitter, author of both the popular e-book, Learning For Profit, and the highly anticipated book, Superior Selling Skills, has extensive experience in sales, training, marketing and personal development over a successful 25 year career. http://www.learningforprofit.com/

Blueprint for Success: Defining Your Goals

2007-08-08T01:13:00.000+08:00

By Nishanth Reddy

Goal means what your aim to reach in the future. In your life establishing goals has a positive impact. A goal is a specific, assessable result that you want to generate at a determinable time in the future. But if what you hope to achieve in life is based on your expectations, rather than on working to reach established goals.Your goals are the stepping-stones toward the understanding of your dreams, the second key element in the blueprint of your life.

Goals are experiences you have not yet had, places you have not yet been, people you have not met, a level of income you have not achieved, a type of relationship you are not now enjoying, or having something you don't currently own.Like your dreams, there is no limit to the number of goals you can set other than the limits of your imagination.
And althoughGoals represent what you intend to achieve in the future, they are always set and worked on in the present.

In university business school graduates who had been out of school for ten years was conducted to determine how they were succeeding toward their goals. Amazingly, 83 percent of the graduates had set no goals at all. This 83 percent reported that they were working hard and staying busy but had no specific future plans. Another 14 percent had goals, but their goals were mental, not written. However, this 14 percent was earning on the average three times the income of those who had no goals at all. Only 3 percent of the entire graduate group had written goals. That 3 percent was earning a whopping ten times what those with no goals were earning.

Particularly goals are written very clearly. Written goals made a dramatic difference in their income levels. Make the difference in your goal is specific level of achievement. Among the business school graduates in the study, the short time they spent establishing.

Clear establish a goal has a positive impact on your life. But if what you hope to achieve in life is based on your expectations, rather than on working to reach established goals, you are setting yourself up for the possibility of disappointment. Expectations have to do with how you believe other people should behave, and how the world should bend at your command.

Your expectations may result in a large amount of grief, whereas established goals will result in a large amount of satisfaction and success. When develop your goal is clear than the winning choice is clear, drop your expectations. It is a mistake to expect that you will accomplish any goal because you deserve it or because there is something in your past that entitles you to it. Unfortunately, there is no such thing as "deserve." You end up achieving in life because of planning and control, not because you have "paid your dues".

3 Steps to Developing Passion Taking Action

Passion for anything occurs at the moment you get a glimpse of the potential for the project, yourself, your mission, and so on. How do you develop passion? The following steps take a look at how you develop passion:

1. Take steps toward your goals. As your plans unfold, each step that you take toward your goals has a direct bearing on your excitement, enthusiasm, and confidence. As you enjoy little successes, your imagination explodes, and passion enters the picture. And when passion is full-blown, it's unlikely that you will abandon your objectives.

2. Use your head to direct the passion that develops. Effective passion is a directed emotion that synergizes all your qualities to make a total you that is considerably greater than the sum of all those qualities. Some identify passion as "heart," because people with passion accomplish things that go beyond their physical and mental abilities.

3. Analyze what you want in life and come up with a plan for reaching those goals. Though passion can be brought on almost instantly by a life-changing event, it usually begins with a careful analysis of what you want in life. What is your direction? In short, what are your goals? After you clearly identify your goals, you develop a plan of action to reach those goals.

Nishanth Reddy is an author and publisher of popular self help blog. Visit his blog for more information on Success, happiness, goal setting, Self help, self-improvement and personal growth.
www.selfhelpzone.com/category/success-happiness/

Whatever

2007-08-07T19:27:00.000+08:00

Whatever We Learnt, Let Us Offer That knowledge

Whatever We Have, Let Us Willingly Give

Whatever We Dream, Let Our Dream Inspire Others

And Bring Them New Courage To Help Their Dreams Live

Whatever We Gain, Let Us Always Be Ready To Share

The True Joy That We Find On The Way ...

For Success Is Not Measured By How Much We Won,

But By How Much We Lovingly Give, Day By Day

***LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST***

a message reflected by the universe

7th august 2007

7:27pm

Obstacles Are Nothing More Than Illusions

2007-08-06T01:18:00.000+08:00

By Michael A. Verdicchio

An illusion is an erroneous perception of reality or an erroneous concept or belief. An optical illusion is an optical phenomenon that results in a false or deceptive visual impression. Optical illusions are a lot like what I call, "obstacle illusions."

For example, when you look down railroad tracks, what do you see? The farther down the tracks you look, the closer the two tracks appear to become. Despite the fact they appear to touch at one point, we all know that in actuality, they do not.

Anyone who is not convinced of this can simply walk down those tracks for awhile and discover for themselves that those tracks do not become physically any closer to each other. It's an optical illusion: a false or deceptive visual impression. It is something we see with our eyes that is really not true to fact.

Now, when I say "obstacle illusion," I mean an obstacle that gives you an erroneous perception of reality. An obstacle is simply something that opposes, or stands in the way, or holds up progress. Far too many people allow obstacles to stop them completely.

Suppose you were on a trip from one city to another and came across some road construction that closed the road you intended to take. Does that obstacle mean that the trip is over? Do you just give up, turn around and go home? If you were to view that obstacle as ending your trip, I would call that an obstacle illusion.

Why? It's because your entire trip doesn't have to end just because of a road closure. You may have to take a detour and go a little out of your way. You may not get there as quickly as you anticipated. You may not get to see the scenery you had hoped to see along the way. However, the trip does not have to be over. You can still get to your destination.

When it comes to life there are many obstacle illusions that just stop people cold in their tracks. A little roadblock pops up and, so often, people quit; they abandon their dreams and desires.

There will always be obstacles that pop up, however, regardless of the obstacle, what is most important is how you choose to see it. If you see it for what it is, just an obstacle, something that is only standing in the way, something that is just holding up progress, then that's fine. Ask for God's help to figure out what your next step will be.

You can be so determined to succeed that no matter what obstacle comes up, you are not going to be stopped in your endeavors. If you instead quit and throw in the towel, well, you've succumbed to an obstacle illusion.

One night many years ago, one of Thomas Edison's laboratories burned to the ground. The following morning, some of Mr. Edison's associates came to tell him about the fire. They were distraught and felt helpless. They told him how terrible it was, how that many of their experiments were lost, and they just didn't know what to do. His associates asked, "What should we do, Mr. Edison?"

Edison wanted to go take a look for himself.

It is reported that his laboratory at that time was worth over a million dollars, and he did not have insurance to cover the loss. After reviewing the damage, he turned to the men and said, "Let's clear it away and build a new laboratory."

Successful people don't quit and throw in the towel. No matter what obstacle you are faced with, don't focus on the obstacle, but instead look for the solution.

Stay focused and determined, and with God's help, there is no obstacle illusion that can stop you.

Michael A. Verdicchio is a husband, father, minister, and broadcaster. He has been the voice on numerous productions over the years.
Michael is the author and producer of Inspirational Pep Talks, available at
http://www.inspirationalpeptalks.com/
He has a free newsletter called, THE PEP LETTER, at
www.christianinspirationalgifts.com/pepletter.html .

Success Is Only One Thought Away!

2007-08-05T00:38:00.000+08:00

By Curt

In my over 14 years of Corporate and Business experience, I have gotten to know many successful individuals in various fields of expertise. Some of these successful people are multi-millionaires, some are respectable experts in their own field of trade. Although each of them has their own personalities, they seem to have some common traits.

One of this key common trait is they have Optimists mindset in their field of work or business. No matter how challenging the situation is, they continue to have strong positive attitude. At times it is as though that they already knew they could overcome the challenge ahead. Their mindset influence how they behave and what actions they take, and they take massive actions in the pursuing of their goal.

This observation is in-line with many motivational Gurus concept of:Belief leads to Behavior; Behavior leads to Actions; Repetitive massive actions; Actions lead to Result.

The successful people tend to have positive mindset and are optimistic most of the time. They take actions like there is no such thing as failure.

Like what Brian Tracy had mentioned in one of the seminar, successful people tend to have Optimistic Orientation, a particular way of thinking about life, the world and things happening around them. Optimist has 4 orientations:

1. Future Orientation They think about the future all the time and with positive expectation.
2. Goal Orientation They are focus in achieving their goal and most of their actions are acting towards achieving the results.
3. Growth Orientation They are always learning and are dire for knowledge. You will not have problem finding them in seminars, books shop or library.
4. Excellence Orientation They are always striving towards excellence.

In conclusion, you can be in the same rank of the successful people by adopting the Optimist Mindset, orientate your mind towards the 4 Orientations and with the correct set of belief, it will drive your behavior and actions which in turn lead to the desire results.

To watch the online video of Brian Tracys opt-in your email to this site to gain the access to the award-winning eLearning Portal:

http://www.learnfromtheguru.com/

About the Author:
Feel free to use this article on your website or ezine as long as the following information about author/website is included.

http://www.learnfromtheguru.com/

Positive Quotes

2007-08-03T23:18:00.000+08:00

"Keep Your Face To The Sunshine

And You Cannot See The Shadow."

**Helen Keller**

******

"The only limit to our realization of
tomorrow will be our doubts of today."

** Franklin D. Roosevelt**

******

"You Are Today Where Your Thoughts Have Brought You;
You Will Be Tomorrow Where Your Thoughts Take You"

**James Allen**

Don't Quit Poem

2007-08-02T22:38:00.000+08:00

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup,
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out--
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

** Author unknown**

Daily Quotes

2007-08-01T18:38:00.000+08:00

"Everyone who got to where

they are had to begin

where they were."

**Richard Paul Evans**

Aspire to Achieve

2007-07-30T13:38:00.000+08:00

Let us be together aspire to achieve
No matter what, no matter when, working hand in hand
Let us go the distance, reach for goals that shine
Creating our future, with everyone in mind

Let us find in our strides, new strength to go on by
Nothing is ever easy, we have to hold on and strive
Let us never be afraid, if we have to change our ways
Through the years, we'll always stay, one in every way

Pass it on

2007-07-29T07:28:00.000+08:00

A candle loses nothing if it is used
to light another one.

***

Feel the Flame Forever Burn
Teaching Lessons We Must Learn
To Bring Us Closer to the
POWER of THE DREAM

***

Some Food for Thought

2007-07-28T20:39:00.000+08:00

By Angie Hembree

I've been working from home for almost 8 years. I've done various things. For the last two years I have worked with a company that has a great team. We all work together to make our dreams come true. What a great concept.....helping each other. You don't see that alot at a j.o.b. or any other home business. That's what makes us different from anyone else.

We have a magazine that the company sends every month. As I was reading this month's magazine I was moved by the inspiration from our teammates and business owners. So I wanted to pass along their words of wisdom. These can be used in life, business and family.

CHARACTER: "Leadership is the capacity and will to rally men and women to a common purpose and the character which inspires confidence." B. Montgomery British Field Marshal

FOCUS: "What people say, what people do, and what they say they do are entirely different things." M. Mead Anthropologist

VISION: "The future belongs to those who see possibilities before they become obvious." J. Sculley, Former CEO of Pepsi and Apple Computer

INITIATIVE: "Success seems to be connected with action.Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don't quit." Conrad Hilton, Hotel Executive

COMMUNICATION: "Developing excellent communication skills is absolutely essential to effective leadership. The leader must be able to share knowledge and ideas to transmit a sense of urgency and enthusiasm to others. If a leader can't get a message across clearly and motivate others to act on it, then having a message doesn't even matter." Gilbert Amelio, President and CEO of National Semiconductor Corp.

COMMITMENT: "People do not follow uncommitted leaders. Commitment can be displayed in full range of matters to the work hours you choose to maintain, how you work to improve your abilities, or what you do for your fellow workers and personal sacrifice." Stephen Gregg, Chairman and CEO of Ethix Corp.

COMPETENCE: "Competence goes beyond words. It's the leader's ability to say it, plan on it, and do it in such a way that others know that you know how and know that they want to follow you." John C. Maxwell

SELF DISIPLINE: "The speed of the leader is the speed of your organization." Russ Paley

PASSION: "Anyone can dabble, but once you've made that commitment, your blood has that particular thing in it, and it's very hard for people to stop you." Bill Cosby

Now reading those words of wisdom apply them to your life. The Vision of my Passion is what keeps me going. Initiative gives me the strength to make a difference by help others.

I'm a wife and mother of two girls. I've been helping others save and earn money from home. Look over my website at http://www.wahw.infinitepossibilitiesteam.com/

To Self Improve You Must Flow Like Water

2007-07-28T20:38:00.000+08:00

By Robin OBrien

Water is found in all living things but it is never contained. Somehow, somewhere it will escape and flow where it wants. To find true happiness you must allow your mind to escape and flow like water.

It was once thought that all life on earth needed 3 things: light, warmth and water, but today scientists have found living organisms deep within caves that never receive light and even bacteria buried deep in the sub-zero ice caps of Antarctica. Life doesnt need light or warmth but one thing is now known to be essential: water.

Water cannot be contained. Sooner or later it escapes and travels on a journey of its own inclination. A river flows, not in a fixed route, rather it follows the contour of the land and, if the landscape changes, the river changes course. The river follows the easiest route, the path of least resistance. Its course may change many times, it may even reach an impasse and form a lake, but eventually it finds its journeys end: the sea. Even man-made waterways, such as canals, dont contain or control water. Glass contains water but cannot keep it. If you ever look at a truly old piece of glass you can see that it has lost its smoothness: you can observe that the surface has what appears to be ripples, like ripples on a pond. The ripples always follow one direction: downward, towards gravity. A pane of glass will actually form a droplet of glass that eventually drips; it just takes a couple of thousand years to do so.

Your journey of self-improvement, to be successful, must be like that of a river. The yearning to improve your inner self is the spring from where your wide river of self-fulfilment will come.

Along the way your journey will take many turns. Youll encounter what seem to be insurmountable obstacles that loom like mountains, but like water youll find the valley or canyon to flow around the obstacles. At times the river will disappear, deep underground. Youll lose sight of it, perhaps for a long time. But, it must resurface eventually, as all rivers do before they reach journeys end.

Your journey will not always be a smooth one. Youll encounter rapids and you may even have to take enormous leaps of faith before tumbling down to where you want to be: but like a waterfall, when you reach the next step along the journey your power and energy will be many fold. You will also experience many stagnant pools along that path where the flow of the river is almost imperceptible. But flow the river does and it will flow freely and cleanly.

The journey will be a rewarding one. Your spring, that tiny step toward self-fulfilment, will turn into a river, perhaps even a great, mighty and wide one. And you wont be alone. A river is not a single entity; rather it is formed by a meeting of many springs: a meeting of minds. Your journeys end will be a confluence of water.

Dont try to constrain your river of self-development. Dont build canals to take the river where you think it should go, or aqueducts to take you over obstacles. Let the river of you journey find its own route. Can the greatest man-made canal ever compare to any river. A river moves, changes, adapts and grows bigger. The water in a canal moves slowly, the course it follows never changes, and it never will grow bigger or wider. Do you want your journey to be that of a canal or a river?

A river follows the path of least resistance. This isnt laziness: it is just expending energy where it is really needed. Your journey must explore every field, valley and wood. Dont expend energy on getting to your destination; spend your energy on exploring the world around you. All rivers eventually flow out to the sea. They all reach journeys end and you will too.

Robin O'Brien is a successfully webmaster and founder of
http://www.%20selfimprovementtechniques.com/where he provides help and support. You can find more self improvement tips on his site.

Profit From The Author Inside You

2007-07-27T15:28:00.000+08:00

By Michael Southon

I've reviewed a number of eBooks recently, and none of themexcited me, but this one definitely did. If you've ever hadthe slightest desire to write a 'How To' book, I urge youto read 'Profit From The Author Inside You'.

It's worth pointing out right at the start that RogerParker does know what he's talking about - he has written24 books that have been translated into 37 languages andthere are currently over 1.6 million copies of his books inprint.

This book assumes that you offer some kind of professionalservice. Roger Parker argues that writing a 'How To' bookis not an end in itself, but a means of positioningyourself as one of the leading experts in your field. AsRoger Parker shows, books possess "magical" powers -writing a book opens the doors to speaking engagements,spinoff books, newsletters, columns, and hefty consultingfees.

I once knew a human resources expert in Australia and hewas very good at what he did. But he used to complainbitterly that there were people with half his expertiseearning 20 times the amount he was. Why? Because they hadwritten a book!

If you've always thought of writing as a painful processthat requires a huge creative effort, you may be in for apleasant shock.

Roger Parker shows that most successful (i.e. top-selling)'How To' books are based on a formula - they are written ina 'paint by numbers' fashion.

The most exciting part of this book for me is a techniquethat Roger Parker calls 'Painless Writing'.

He urges you to throw out of the window two very common(and unsuccessful) approaches to writing a book: MarathonWriting ("Getting away from it all" and dropping all otheractivities while you work on your book) and Linear Writing(trying to write your book from first to last chapter in anordered sequence).

Instead, he offers three approaches that will change theway you write and make it much easier and much more fun:

(1) Molecular writing - this is a way of 'chunking down'to the level of bite-sized pieces of information:"harvesting individual ideas, or nuggets of information,which you carefully organize and prioritize beforebeginning writing".

(2) Measurable progress writing - "committing to write alittle each day, building time into your daily schedule (asopposed to escaping to a cabin in the woods)".

(3) Non-sequential writing - "jumping into your projectwherever you're comfortable, starting with the easiestideas, and building your confidence point by point, idea byidea, wherever they appear in your book".

Another part of this book that is essential reading ifyou're thinking of writing a book is Chapter Four - '10Characteristics of Successful Titles'. Did you know thatat least half of your book's success will be determined bythe title you choose?

Roger Parker shows you 10 key concepts that make thedifference between a title that sells well and one thatflops. (Here's a hint: the following titles all use these10 key concepts: Chicken Soup For The Soul; Rich Dad, PoorDad; The Millionaire Next Door; The 7 Habits of HighlyEffective People; Think and Grow Rich; How to Win Friendsand Influence People).

The book also contains 4 work sheets (pages 99 to 120) thatguide you through the writing of your book.

'Profit From The Author Inside You' set of explosions in myhead on virtually every page. In fact, it fired me up so muchthat I'm now using Roger Parker's techniques to write a bookthat I've been trying to write for over 5 years. What morecan I say?

You can get your copy of 'Profit From The Author Inside You'at: http://www.freezineweb.com/cgi-bin/pftaiy.cgi It has a 30day money back guarantee, so you really can't go wrong.

---------------------------------------------------------------
Michael Southon has been writing for the Internet for over 3 years.
He has shown hundreds of webmasters how to use this simple
technique to build a successful online business.
Click here to find out more: http://ezine-writer.com/
---------------------------------------------------------------

Thomas Edison

2007-07-26T15:39:00.000+08:00

"If we did all the things we were

capable of doing, we would literally

astound ourselves."

Thomas Edison

Jason Lee

2007-07-25T11:18:00.000+08:00

I am grateful for all my challenges because of who they make me!

I have culled a bouquet of diverse flowers amongst men's gardens ... and nothing is my own ... save the strings that bindeth them.

Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.(KJV)

Of Mice, Maze and Constant Change.

2007-07-22T02:18:00.000+08:00

Life

isn't along a straight and easy path

where we can travel

unhampered and unhindered

but a MAZE of vestibules

through which we must seek and find

now and again, mystified and baffled

thwarted in concealed pathway.

But unceasingly, when we believe,

Providence will provide a way for us,

not one that we ourselves think is perfect

but one that will eventually attest to the fact.

Opportunities Missed

2007-07-18T00:19:00.000+08:00

There was a very cautious man
Who never laughed or played
He never risked, he never tried
He never sang or prayed
And when he one day passed away
His insurance was denied
For since he never really lived
They claimed he never died

Positive Thinking

2007-07-17T09:38:00.000+08:00

When I change my Thinking, I change my Beliefs

When I change my beliefs, I change my Expectations

When I change my expectations, I change my Attitude

When I change my attitude, I change my Behavior

When I change my behavoir, I change my Performance

When I change my performance, I CHANGE MY LIFE !

Prepare for a Long, Healthy Life

2007-07-10T00:38:00.000+08:00

Most teens assume they will always be healthy, but research shows that modern teens are starting to have serious health problems. What can you do to increase your odds for a lifetime of good health?

by Greg Sargent

It would be hilarious if it weren't so outrageous. Some scientists are proposing that we reengineer our bodies in order to prevent accidents, avoid disease and promote longevity. Ideas recently conceived by "experts" and published in a popular news weekly include extra ribs to prevent hernias, backward-bending knees to reduce joint friction, swiveling oversize ears to enhance hearing in old age, and squid-like eyes (less prone to vision loss).
These were only some of the ideas. The result? A really odd-looking, contorted body! One expert claimed the human body wasn't designed for longevity. Were we designed to become obese and plagued with disease as we grow older?

Teens affected, too

Perhaps you're thinking, "How in the world does this subject apply to me? I'm young. Old age doesn't concern me. Disease won't affect me." When I was a teenager, I thought the same way. Actually, I gave those subjects no thought at all! But stop and think. Every old person, every disabled and diseased adult, was once a teenager--just like you. Unfortunately, more and more teens are experiencing shortened life spans and disabling diseases.

One author puts it this way: "Most people think heart disease is an adult disease, the result of many years of an improper diet. However, in a recent study reported in The American Heart Association Journal, dangerous advanced arterial plaque was found in teens and young adults who had died in accidents, by suicide, or had been murdered.... Obesity is becoming a major health deterrent of children, teens, and young adults" (Tipworld, www.topica.com/tipworld, by Elizabeth Thornberry).

Oops! Health does have something to do with teenagers. Let's Live magazine stated the following in its "weightwatch" section: "A diet high in sweets and fats coupled with sedentary activities, like channel surfing and cruising the Internet, could be a disaster in the making for many of today's children. A study by researchers at the University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill, found that obese children are 53 more times likely to have insulin resistance, a syndrome that often precedes development of adult-onset (type II) diabetes. This disease can cause blindness and amputation" (February 2001, p. 28). To emphasize the point, the section was titled "Obese Kids and Diabetes."

Obesity's effects

Weight gain seems to be the scourge of our society. There has been a recent 70 percent increase in the rate of obesity among young adults--both male and female.
Too much weight results in all types of infirmities. Heart disease, cancer, strokes and diabetes are on the list. These four problems alone are responsible for 65 percent of all deaths in the United States. What can you, as a young person, do to avoid obesity and maximize your future health?

Diets don't work

Gail O'Connor (Teen People, April 2000, pp. 204-205) recently asked, "What percentage of dieters gain back all of their lost weight--or more--within one year? A. 25%, B. 50%, C. 65% or D. 95%?" Continuing, she wrote: "Answer: D, 95%! Dieting doesn't work! Besides the fact that nearly every person who goes on a diet regains the weight, radically reducing the amount of food you eat slows your metabolism, so most people end up fatter than before."
Another author, Jane Brody, in The New York Times Book of Health writes: "The body adjusts its weight to a preset goal...researchers have found that all people, fat or thin, adjust their metabolism to maintain their weight" (p. 35). If dieting isn't the answer (and guys, pay attention because if you're not overweight now, there's a 63 percent chance you will be fat by age 25), what is the answer?

Raise your metabolic rate

Since the brain adjusts to dieting by lowering metabolism, you have to do something. Not long ago, I came across some general information about metabolism. Although no specific source was cited, the information is in line with published guidelines from most knowledgeable health educators.

The paper noted, "Basal metabolic rate is the base amount of energy needed to keep your heart, lungs, muscles and organs going at rest. Here are some simple ideas that can speed up metabolic rate.

Eat breakfast. If you skip it, you will tell your body that you are starving it and it slows down metabolism.

Don't reduce your caloric intake to less than 1,200 calories per day. If you do, you will again tell your body that you are starving it. You again reduce your metabolic rate.
Increase your activity by doing some fast walking or short workout. It doesn't have to be extensive. Short term raising of your activity level increases your metabolic rate."
Gail O'Connor agrees. According to her, "If your doctor has told you to shed some pounds, then do what experts know does work to help you lose weight: Exercise for 30 to 40 minutes, five times a week, and moderately reduce calorie intake" (Teen People, April 2000, p. 205).

Why we're getting fat

An article in U.S. News and World Report recently explained, "Both men and women are getting fat in epidemic proportions. Well over half of all American adults--about 63 percent of men and 55 percent of women age 25 and older--are overweight" (November 8, 1999, p. 82). The article points out that the problem is not just with adults: "...a decrease in physical activity [emphasis mine throughout article] among both sexes is contributing to a recent 70 percent increase in the rate of obesity among young adults" (ibid., p. 83). An insert article under the title, "Cutting Kid's Weights," reported that 1 in every 5 U.S. children is overweight. Did you notice that the cause was "a decrease in physical activity"?

Elizabeth Thornberry echoes the importance of physical exercise, writing, "We need as parents to make sure our children are eating healthy food in correct proportions and participating in 30 minutes of moderate physical activity each day. Physical activity will help to control fatness, reduce cholesterol, and prevent high blood pressure" (ibid.).

Many authors are lining up, telling us to engage in more activity. "Since 1985 the American Cancer Society has recommended regular exercise as part of its 10-step program to prevent cancer" (Book of Health, Brody, p. 36). Brody points out that being sedentary is just as bad a vice as cigarette smoking. "For women, exercise, particularly during the teenage and young adult years, seems to be associated with lower rates of breast cancer and various...cancers of the reproductive tract" (ibid., p. 55).

In his book, Antioxidant Revolution, Kenneth Cooper quotes the American Heart Association as stating, "inactivity is a primary risk factor for heart disease" (p. 49). Consider what Dr. Cooper says exercise will do for you. According to this noted expert, aerobic exercise, three times a week for 20 minutes each session, will enhance your immune system, prevent bone disease, cause less bone loss and fewer joint symptoms, give you more flexibility, give you greater strength and longevity, produce fewer medical problems, reduce body fat by increasing metabolism, result in fewer medications and will give you 3 1/2 times less disabilities by the time all is said and done.

Avoid animal fat

While there are many more actions you can take for improved health, consider one more. Dr. Cooper also says, "...the researchers found that the more animal fat and the fewer vegetables and fruits consumed, the higher the coronary death rate was in the countries studied" (ibid., p. 144).
The Bible tells us not to consume animal fat or unclean meats. Further, God's Word contains many examples of foods we should eat including fruits, vegetables, seeds, nuts and clean meat. If we follow the words of our Parent in heaven, the consequences should result in living much longer (Exodus 20:12).

Live to 120?

There is little doubt that we can live much longer, in health, than today's average life span. Leading researchers in the study of longevity contradict those who espouse the premise that our bodies were not designed to live long.

The Maffetone Report (January/February 2001, Volume 3, Issue 1) maintains that the average life span for an animal is six times their skeletal maturity. Dr. Ash and Beth Ley, in their book DHEA, Unlocking the Secrets to the Fountain of Youth, state the figure is seven times maturity. A medium-sized dog is mature at 2 and lives to be 14 years old. A horse matures at age 3 and lives to be 24 or 25. Humans mature at 20 and live less than four times that length. Why can't humans live to be 120 (six times their skeletal maturity)?

The report continued by stating, "How well you care for yourself from the earliest age has a significant impact on both the quantity and quality of your life." Deja vu? Solomon said the same thing in Ecclesiastes 12:1: "Remember now your Creator in the days of your youth, before the difficult days come, and the years draw near when you say, 'I have no pleasure in them.'"
So what should we conclude? Perhaps we don't need a restructuring of our physical bodies after all. Perhaps we should just heed God's Word, "If you do not carefully observe all the words of this law.... He will bring back on you all the diseases of Egypt.... Also every sickness and every plague" (Deuteronomy 28:58-61).

The choice is yours. Start now to increase your chance for a long, healthy life. YU....www.ucg.org

Greg Sargent directs Pinecrest, a United Youth Camp in southern Missouri, and pastors United Church of God congregations in St. Louis, Columbia, and Kansas City, MO.

Choosing Your Friends

2007-07-08T21:18:00.000+08:00

Learn the value of true friendship by being a good friend. "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity" (Proverbs 17:17).

by Larry W. Greider

You can't pick your brothers and sisters. You inherit them, and hopefully grow to love and appreciate them. Sadly, many brothers and sisters, through competition and struggle, lose the great joy God intended. As the proverb suggests, some only discover the love and closeness of their closest kin when the chips are down.

What makes good friends?

Do you have a best friend? Would you like to have a soul mate to confide in and grow close to by sharing your thoughts and feelings? Most young people move in and out of many superficial relationships trying not to be dumped, hurt, ridiculed or ostracized. There are many trivial reasons why people turn on others in our society. When values become focused on things rather than people, it is easy to run over the feelings of others in order to attract the fleeting eye of those judged to be "cool." These shallow relationships are like the early morning fog that dissipates as the day goes on.

How to make lasting friends

The purpose of this article is to help you discover the joy of a good friend, perhaps even a best friend. There are several important ground rules when picking and developing a relationship with others. Let me suggest a few guidelines:

Pick those who have the same values (or who at least don't trash those things that are important to you). The Scriptures give timeless insight into the dynamics of relationships. Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 15:33, "Do not be deceived: 'Evil company corrupts good habits.'"
If you run with the turkeys, you will not soar with the eagles. Perhaps the single most powerful reason for doing what you know is not right is peer pressure. It is a rare and determined person who doesn't bend, at least part of the time, to the taunts and expectations of the crowd. Determine now to be your own person and pick those who will respect you for that! (For more information about this important subject be sure to read our article in this issue titled, "Rise Above Peer Pressure").

Relationships take work.If you want friends, you need shared experiences. It is difficult to bump into someone in the hallway and consider him or her a true friend. A proverb explains, "A man who has friends must himself be friendly" (Proverbs 18:24). It is possible that your own brother or sister can be a close friend, but such a friendship takes the same amount of work, sometimes more, since there are more times for you to irritate each other.

If you work on projects together, attend the same church, go to camp together or have the same interests, you'll find it much easier to have things in common that will help you bond with someone else. There are several keys that are vital. Listen to your friend and be willing to give and take--not just take. Also, keep a confidence (unless something you hear needs to be passed on, such as some abuse, drug habit or other serious problem).

Be honest with each other. Perhaps nothing separates friends quicker than being insincere. If you want a good, lifelong relationship, be true and honest from the get-go. Again, the wisdom of the ancients rings so true for today: "Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful" (Proverbs 27:6). This doesn't mean that a boatload of discretion isn't needed. Just because you don't like an outfit or hairdo, you don't need to humiliate your friend. There is always something nice to say.

Widen your circle of friends. If you make some good friends, don't form a clique. Open up your circle to include others, especially those who are new to your world. It takes some risk to open up to others and invite them in, but most of us are shy and awkward about starting friendships. If you see someone by himself or herself, share some of your time with that person. It might be one of the best investments you ever make.

Due to the scattered nature of God's Church, you might have pockets of friends all over the world. Broaden your circle and take advantage of every opportunity to build a network of those who have the same values as yourself. Friends can help you grow and learn many new things. As the proverb says, "As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend" (Proverbs 27:17).

The speed of change and deteriorating morality of our culture makes it a difficult place in which to live and grow. Our values are under assault at every turn. It can be overwhelming to struggle to succeed when many break the rules, are crass, vulgar, dishonest and yet, seem to gain the advantage. We need soul mates to help us through the rocky roads that lie ahead for each of us. Perhaps you can make the difference in someone else's life by developing many healthy friendships. United Youth Camps offer many opportunities to find and develop lifelong friendships. Why not make the effort to find those who have similar values and work at building relationships that will last a lifetime? You won't be sorry. After all, God created us to be His friends (James 2:23)! YU ... www.ucg.org

How to Be a Good Friend

2007-07-07T21:33:00.000+08:00

You never know when someone is going to call on you to be a friend. Many young people find it difficult to find someone in their community that has the same set of values and mind set. It is hard to find true friends who are willing to stick by your side through whatever may come. But those who find these rare individuals are truly blessed.

What is a best friend? Do you have one? Having a best friend is a true gift. Knowing that someone is there for you through thick and thin brings a whole new joy to life. Life for a teenager can be hard and even depressing, but knowing that there is someone there to call on if needed can certainly lighten the load. Today, possessions seem to take over our minds more and more and people tend to lose sight of the value of good, healthy relationships.

In life, we simply don't know whom we are going to encounter in the future or if someone will become a real friend. Even so, we can learn to be good friends ourselves. With that in mind, here are a few suggestions on how to be a good friend.

Be there for them. Listen to them. When friends come for advice or an opinion, we have to give them our full attention by listening carefully. Eye contact helps and turning off any distractions lets them know that you take them seriously. Whether it's giving them a shoulder to cry on or patiently listening, show that you really care.

Be honest. There is nothing more hurtful than lies. We have to earn a friend's trust, and nothing destroys trust more than lies. To be a good friend, be honest. When friends come to you, they should be confident that they are getting genuine, transparent truth. Although we all know the truth can sometimes sting, there is nothing like tactful honesty among friends, motivated by care and concern. Be true to your word and do as you say. This dependability will pay rich rewards in developing a lifelong friend.

Don't exclude. Some of the best times come when we are with a group of friends. We don't always need to have just one best friend. Having 10 or 20 will provide lots of security and comfort. It will also mean that we are more likely to have one around when we need one. Being friendly encourages others to want to be around us. We all need friends, so why not offer to be one for others?

Be understanding. If you are lucky enough to have a friend in the Church nearby, more power to you. Often there isn't another person in your entire school who believes like you do. If your friends have different beliefs, you will need to give each other a little latitude for differences of opinions. The important thing is to show respect to each other.

In today's world there are a lot of traps we must avoid, and sometimes we may be surprised to learn how many other young people are trying to do what is right. If we live what we have been fortunate enough to learn, people will honor and respect us for our values. If we are good friends to others, it is likely that our circle of friends will also grow. As we move through life, let's remember how important good friends are! — Aaron Greider YU ..... www.ucg.org

To Each is Given

2007-07-06T15:28:00.000+08:00

Isn't it strange that princes and kings,
and clowns that caper in sawdust rings,
and ordinary folk like you and me
are builders of eternity.

To each is given a bag of tools,
an hour glass and a book of rules,
and each must build, e're life is flown,
a stumbling block or a stepping stone.

Faith vs doubts

2007-07-05T01:28:00.000+08:00

Doubts sees only Obstacles but Faith sees the Way
Doubts sees the darkest Nite but Faith sees the Day
Doubts dreads to take a Step but Faith Soars on High
Doubts questions ... "who can" ... Faith answers "I"

RichDeVos

Careers in the New Millennium

2007-07-03T10:38:00.000+08:00

What trends will shape your future world of work? What can you do to prepare for the right career for you?

by Mike Bennett

Whole new careers are being created almost daily, it seems. Advances in medicine, the Internet, robotics and other new technologies keep expanding the options for your future career. Now you can choose to be a cytotechnologist or an XML developer, a change manager or an undersea medicine physician, along with hundreds of other new and traditional careers.

All this can make planning for your future career seem a little overwhelming. To help, government and private agencies have produced a wealth of research on what tomorrow's job market will be like. Since predicting future job trends is not an exact science, there are some differences of opinion. But let's look at some trends many experts agree on.

According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, computer-related careers will continue to be hot. Its top five fastest growing occupations through 2008 are:

Computer engineers (up 108 percent)
Computer support specialists (up 102 percent)
Systems analysts (up 94 percent)
Database administrators (up 77 percent)
Desktop publishing specialists (up 73 percent)
Of course how fast a career is growing doesn't tell the whole story. Though desktop publishing specialists will grow 73 percent, the total number of additional jobs is only 19,000. On the other hand, retail salespersons, cashiers and general managers /top executives are each expected to add more than half a million new jobs, though their growth rates are less than 20 percent.

Experts also predict that the health care field will continue to grow as the Baby Boomers grow older and as medical advancements continue. Half of the top 25 fastest growing occupations are in health care, from medical assistants (58 percent growth) to physician assistants (48 percent), from medical records technicians (44 percent) to respiratory therapists (43 percent). Registered nurses are expected to add 450,000 jobs, the seventh largest job growth, though this is "only" a 22 percent increase.

Will you be in demand?
These few growth trends are only the tip of the iceberg, so it's not a problem if none of the jobs mentioned above are interesting to you. Out of the thousands of other careers, there are sure to be a number that will fit you. But an overview of the working world can help you see how to prepare for the careers of the future.

How have things changed in recent years? "Procedures that took hours or weeks a few years ago can now be performed in minutes or even seconds on high-powered computers," writes Barbara Eklund in the Career Information Center (Volume 13). "Rapid, ongoing change is a basic characteristic of the new economy.

"Ever-improving telecommunications systems have...made the worldwide market a reality. This means that American corporations must compete on a global basis. To do this they need more information, more-advanced technology, more-highly trained workers, greater flexibility and, of course, increased productivity." So your future employers will be looking for highly trained and adaptable workers. "Flexible organizations require workers to continue to learn new skills and, if necessary, change their jobs," said Allan Salt, former director of the ILO Training Department.

Education is essential. "The number of new jobs open to Americans with four-year bachelors degrees will rise twice as fast as the number of jobs requiring short-term experience and training," according to career site www.embark.com.

In the job market of tomorrow, training and learning won't stop when a full-time job begins. Careers are changing so rapidly that there is a "need for lifelong learning," according to Jeffrey Hallett in his book, Worklife Visions.

Charting your career path
Planning and preparing for your career is a challenging task, but it can be rewarding. Here are some of the basics:

Find out about yourself. This is a lifelong process, but so is career planning. In your school years, the idea is to write down the things you enjoy and are good at. What are your favorite subjects, hobbies, activities, sports and so on? Writing these down will give you an idea of some of your interests.

Your aptitudes--things you have natural talent for—can be harder to find. You may not have tried any activity in which you could demonstrate your ability in a certain area. That's one reason it's good to try new things.

You'll also find out things you don't like, which can help you avoid getting stuck in a career you don't like.

You may find, as many people do, that the most difficult person to see clearly is yourself. You need a mirror—someone who knows you well, such as a parent, teacher or friend—to help you see hidden aptitudes and interests. Seek God's help, too, by asking for His guidance (Proverbs 3:5-6). The book of Proverbs is full of good advice for making the best decisions, and keeping everything in the right priority. Our jobs are important, but not more important than our relationships with God and family.

Find out about careers. What do various jobs involve? Many governments publish books that describe different occupations. The United States publishes the Occupational Outlook Handbook which describes what workers do, how much they earn, the training and education required and the projected job outlook. This handbook is available in many libraries, and on-line at http://stats.bls.gov/ocohome.htm.

Other methods of finding out about careers are talking with your school career counselor, exploring other career Web sites, watching career films, attending career presentations, working part-time or volunteering.

Talk to people who do various jobs. Ask about the good and bad points. Learn about advancement, education, the nature of the job, health requirements or hazards.

Now consider job trends. Which job fields are growing, which have fierce competition and which are going the way of the dinosaur? Weigh these factors with all the others to narrow your search to two or three career fields and perhaps five to 10 specific careers.

You don't have to eliminate a career you really love just because it's not growing as fast. Just be realistic about your talents and the competition you'll face. Natural enthusiasm, talents and hard work can give you the edge you need.

Plan your educational program. Try to develop a program that will qualify you for several of the careers highest on your list. If that's not possible, at least plan an education that will provide a foundation for further studies in the other areas.

Pursue a broad education and focus on industries, not just specific careers. Many careers require a broad educational experience. Trying a variety of courses will also help you in working with others and will teach you more about yourself.

Start your career planning early and continue your planning and education throughout your life. Then you'll be ready for the careers of the new millennium. YU.....www.ucg.org

How To Plan Your Life

2007-06-27T19:18:00.000+08:00

Part 1 - Get a Plan

by Ken Treybig

Where will you be two years from now? What will you be doing? Will you be in high school? Will you be in college by then? What about five or 10 years from now? What do you want to be doing, or have you given it any thought? If you are in the workforce by then, what kind of job do you think you'll have? Will it be a minimum wage job in the fast—food industry, or will you be working at a meaningful and challenging job?

The natural tendency for all of us is to assume the best will happen to us. We like to think that when it comes our time to get a job that it will be an interesting and productive one where we will feel a sense of accomplishment. We like to believe we will have an appreciative boss, or that perhaps we'll be our own boss and that our work environment will be one of our own making.
But the fact is most people tend to drift in life. Some have goals for their lives, and actively work toward those goals. But more often than not, people tend to drift along allowing the currents of life to push them first one direction then the other. Like a leaf floating along in a swiftly moving stream, they allow themselves to be at the mercy of outside forces as their lives unfold.

It is true that life throws us curves. There are many external forces that sometimes seem to converge on our lives, pushing us one direction or the other. There are times when life seems to demand that we make choices about our future, and sometimes it seems we are very limited in the options we have. Still, the fact is we have choices.

A leaf being carried along on a stream has no choice. It is bound by the laws of nature to go where the currents carry it. But God has given human beings minds with the ability to make choices. And He tells us we must make choices in life, as He instructed the fledgling nation of Israel after He freed them from captivity and led them to the land He promised their ancestors (Deuteronomy 30:19).

Where do you want to go?

Many years ago I read a book titled If You Don't Know Where You're Going, You'll Probably End Up Somewhere Else by David Campbell, Ph.D. Somehow that title stuck with me. It seemed to make such a simple yet profound statement all by itself. To this day I think of that title often, especially when I read passages like Proverbs 22:3 that address the importance of looking ahead in life and watching where you're going. That verse says, "A prudent man foresees evil and hides himself, but the simple pass on and are punished."

It is only by looking beyond our next immediate step that we will be able to keep from being washed along by the currents of life. By looking farther up the path of life, we greatly improve our chances of steering away from some of the troubles that could be waiting for us.
To improve your ability to look ahead in the road of life and prepare yourself, you will have to do some thinking and planning for the future. The book, If You Don't Know Where You're Going, You'll Probably End Up Somewhere Else, talks about the inevitable fact that in life everyone will come upon forks in the road where they will have to choose the direction they will go. Those forks are often like gates, and unless you have the skills, education and/or developed abilities that are needed to unlock that gate, you will be forced to go another direction—even if you would really like to explore what lies along that path beyond a particular gate (pp. 18—20).
This emphasizes the importance of accumulating and cultivating personal assets which will allow you to open those gates. Personal assets take the form of education and experience with your skills and aptitudes. At the very least, you need to know what your assets are—what you can do well or have the best possibility of doing well.

Initiative needed

Whether or not you will be able to choose certain paths in life will depend entirely upon you. It will depend on whether you have the required personal assets. This means you will have to take the initiative to discover and develop them. As the previously mentioned book points out in its conclusion, "People who want milk should not seat themselves on a stool in the middle of a field in hopes that the cow will back up to them" (p. 130). Each person needs to take the initiative to improve his or her chances for success in life. That's why planning for the future is so important.
Many people dream of success, but the planning that is needed to accomplish our goals goes well beyond just dreaming. Dreaming about future success can be enjoyable. But dreaming does little to bring that dream into reality. It doesn't develop any personal assets. The critical difference between dreaming and planning is that planning takes one beyond the dream. It involves working toward a means of making the dream a reality.

For example, a young person who is interested in aviation can dream about flying. He can imagine what it would be like to have the freedom of a bird to soar above the clouds. He can dream of how it would feel to have the freedom to go in any direction. But those dreams will never become reality unless some steps are taken to make that dream come true. It will take work to move that dream into the category of a plan for the future. This requires action and doing some research. It requires finding and talking to people in the field of aviation. It requires finding out what steps need to be taken and how to come up with the money for flying lessons or to attend a school of aeronautics.

Make no mistake about it. It does require work on your part. Perhaps this is why so many people find it easier to just dream and not develop a plan for life. Proverbs 13:11 (Living Bible) teaches the benefit of hard work saying, "Wealth from gambling quickly disappears; wealth from hard work grows." Other passages also point out the benefit of work and that mere talk without work is of no benefit (Proverbs 14:23; 28:19).

The effort of creating a plan for your life will be well worth it. It will help you discover and accumulate your own personal assets, which will allow you to be more in control of your future.
Anyone can just drift and take life as it comes. Those who do so will be like that leaf that is totally at the mercy of the currents in a stream. But those who make definite plans in life will find they are more like a person with a paddle in a canoe or raft. They will not just be at the mercy of the currents. They will have the ability to choose the direction they want to go as they travel the river of life. It will take some work. But it is well worth it in the end.

Where will you be in a few years? The answer to that question is largely up to you. An old German proverb says, "You have to take life as it happens, but you should try to make it happen the way you want to take it." Don't just drift in life. Create a plan for it so you can help shape it.

In the next article in this series, we will consider how people can find career paths that "fit" them. Be sure to continue reading "How to Plan Your Life" so you will have the best chance for success. YU ..... www.ucg.org

William James

2007-06-23T01:38:00.000+08:00

The great use of Life is to spend it for something that will outlast it!

What Is Success to You?

2007-06-19T09:38:00.000+08:00

by Doug Horchak

Some years ago, a bumper sticker made the rounds on many vehicles in the United States. It simply said, "He Who Dies With the Most Toys--WINS!" While such a statement can make us chuckle, it did, nonetheless, express the growing trend in our society to define our happiness and main pursuit in life in terms of "things." What about you?

With a new year and century beginning, many people reflect on goals, plans and their desire to achieve success. Not just anyone's definition of success—but their own vision of fulfillment and happiness.

Do you have goals and achievements you are shooting for during the next year? The next 10 years? Many people know they want to "succeed," but are often confused about what it is they are really after. You don't have to fall into that trap.

We are living at a time when a growing number of people in the developed nations define success by a certain dollar amount or annual salary. Whether it is money itself or the possession of "things"—computers, new cars, the latest clothing or the most current electronic gadgetry—this generation often focuses on the possession of wealth in some form to determine "success."

In this issue of YOUTH United we look at the subject of success and happiness from several different angles. The authors examine the growing preoccupation with materialism in our society, and the guidance that God's Word gives us about covetousness. They look at how to give yourself the advantage of preparing and planning for your future. This issue's "Your Education" feature focuses on the importance of developing often overlooked aspects of your intelligence—your emotions and character.

As you'll discover in the articles in this issue, success is not as superficial as it is painted in the media. Truer words were never spoken than when Jesus Christ instructed His disciples in Luke 12:15, "And He said to them, 'Take heed and beware of covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses.'"

As Christ instructed His followers, true success in the long run involves satisfaction and accomplishment beyond our wildest dreams. It means discovering the true potential given to you and all of mankind by your Creator and enjoying the journey of life to achieve it. The obstacles we might face on the course are not worthy to be compared to the prize. You'll find that helping others in their journey adds joy and happiness to the trip.

If you'd like to know more about your potential and the destiny God has given you, read the inspiring booklet, What Is Your Destiny?.

Here's to your true, never-ending success! YU ..... www.ucg.org

Increasing Our Intelligence

2007-06-18T15:38:00.000+08:00

Are people just born either smart or dumb? Is there anything you can do about it?

by David Treybig

Is "book smarts" all that counts? No doubt, obtaining a good education is a great investment for the future. Parents, teachers and community leaders regularly give such advice. And it is well founded. The book of Proverbs, written specifically to younger people, tells its readers to "Get wisdom. Get understanding" because "Wisdom is the principal thing" (Proverbs 4:5, 7). But what if you don't do well in school? Is there anything you can do to increase your chances for success?

Over the last century, American psychologists have tried to find ways to measure wisdom or intelligence. Testing a person's IQ (intelligence quotient) has been one of the most widely used measures of potential success. For example, a test developed by psychologist Lewis Terman at Stanford University was widely administered to approximately two million American men during World War I to determine their intelligence. It was assumed that people were simply born smart or dumb and there was nothing they could do about it. Based on this newly devised test to measure IQ, the men serving in the U.S. military during World War I were assigned duties according to their perceived intelligence.

Similar to the IQ test, grade point averages and college entrance exams (such as the SAT and ACT) have also been used to determine a person's intelligence and as predictors of success. But over the years, many people began to realize that these indicators of intelligence were not guarantees of success. In fact, many apparently intelligent people have failed to live up to their perceived abilities. Valedictorians and people with perfect scores on their college entrance exams have been known to flounder in the real world outside of the classroom. And others with much lower scores have often turned out to be more successful in life than it was thought possible.

How could so many apparent contradictions be explained? Furthermore, is it possible to increase your intelligence? The surprising answer to this second question is, "Yes, some forms of intelligence can be developed." The purpose of this article is to identify things a young person can do to increase his or her intelligence and overall success in life. But before we consider these questions, we need to understand what is meant by intelligence.

Measuring intelligence
Intelligence can be measured in many ways. Psychologist Howard Gardner of the Harvard School of Education wrote in his book, Frames of Mind, in 1983 that intelligence leading to success should be measured over a wide spectrum of intelligences, with seven key varieties. His list included the typical verbal and mathematical tests plus five other measures including spatial capacities, kinesthetic abilities, musical gifts, interpersonal skills and inner contentment.

In 1995, Daniel Goleman added to the collective understanding on this subject with a book titled Emotional Intelligence. Addressing the failure of traditional tests to accurately predict success, he wrote: "There are widespread exceptions to the rule that IQ predicts success...[more] exceptions than cases that fit the rule. At best, IQ contributes about 20 percent to the factors that determine life success, which leaves 80 percent to other forces" (p. 34).

According to this noted psychologist, one of the concepts representing these "other forces" is emotional intelligence - a brain function quite distinct from the verbal and mathematical-logical functions most often measured. As Goleman explained, "In a sense we have two brains, two minds - and two different kinds of intelligence: rational and emotional. How we do in life is determined by both - it is not just IQ, but emotional intelligence that matters" (p. 28). When Goleman speaks of emotional intelligence, he is referring to self-awareness, character and the ability to control impulse. The presence of these characteristics seems to be a better indicator of future success than the purely rational skills.

Character
Interestingly, when the Bible instructs us to seek wisdom and understanding, it does so with the expectation that we can obtain this kind of emotional intelligence - it makes no sense to encourage someone to attempt something that is impossible to obtain. The importance of developing character—the ability to control our emotions and actions—is also addressed in the Bible. Proverbs 16:32 says, "He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city." Learning to rule our spirit, that is, control our thoughts and feelings, is a form of intelligence that can be developed.

News stories abound where emotionally unstable people seemingly go crazy and shoot up a school or business when they feel that they have been mistreated. In such cases, rational thought and emotional control seem to be thrown out the proverbial window. The missing ingredient in so many of these tragedies is character - the ability to know right from wrong, choose right and carry out the right, godly action regardless of the circumstances.

Some people mistakenly believe character means denying all emotions. But such is not the case. Emotions have the potential to provide richness to life that is simply unattainable through other means. Those who have watched the television show Star Trek: The Next Generation have seen the curious observations of the character Data, an emotionless android, who tries to learn what it is like to have human emotions. This character comes to understand that though he has more rational knowledge and dexterity than any human, his lack of emotions prevents him from being human. He is emotionally neutral since he is unable to relish a great accomplishment or feel the sorrow of defeat or loss of a friend.

Emotional intelligence or character simply means living in a balanced way. Rational thought and emotions are balanced - neither completely dominating the other. When balance is not maintained, our life flounders. While the absence of emotion makes life bland and boring, overly intense emotions held for too long a period of time can undermine stability. Given this understanding, managing our moods and thoughts becomes a full-time job.

The key to emotional intelligence
Psychologists have discovered that emotionally intelligent people have a number of coping skills to balance the ups and downs that seem to accompany everyone's life. Such individuals seem to be keenly aware of their feelings and able to adjust their moods as needed. Relationship skills and dealing with anger are two areas where the presence of emotional intelligence is quickly apparent.

Concerning relationships, those possessing this type of intelligence are able to sense the feelings of others around them and positively influence others as the occasion may warrant. In dealing with anger, these same people have learned how to soften or dissuade their anger. They are not necessarily push-overs or apathetic; they may clearly explain their dissatisfaction. But they do so without losing control or going into a senseless rage.

According to the Bible, the key to this emotional intelligence lies in the mind. As a man "thinks in his heart, so is he" (Proverbs 23:7). To help us develop and grow into our fullest potential, the Bible is filled with scriptures explaining how to think and act. In simplest terms, we are told to imitate Christ in the way He thought and conducted Himself (Philippians 2:5; 1 John 2:6). We are to let His mind be in us.

Increasing our intelligence
Now that we understand the emotional side of intelligence, we can address the question of how to increase our overall intelligence. Developing emotional maturity through the study of God's Word and learning to model the behavior He desires are vital parts of living a successful life. Unfortunately, many people do not realize the critical importance God places upon this aspect of our education.

If you would like to learn more about the behaviors and thinking God expects of us, request your copies of Making Life Work and Transforming Your Life. They are also available for viewing or downloading from our literature library on the same site.

Learning to think like God definitely increases our emotional intelligence. Why not enhance your education in this vital field as well as in the more traditional areas? You have nothing to lose and much to gain. YU ..... www.ucg.org

Positive Affirmations

2007-06-16T23:18:00.000+08:00

You are free of all anxious thoughts and habits
Even when things don't go your way, you remain optimistic
that it will all get better soon
You are free of all negativity in your life
You are grateful for your challenges because of who they make you
You are happy in spite of all your challenges
Even though you embrace abundance in all areas of your life,
you are free of greed
You can breathe life into any task no matter how unpleasant it may be
You can forgive other people for their mistakes
You are free of all resentment and bitterness towards others
You quickly forgive yourself for the mistakes you make
You now find it easy to respond positively to the stresses of everyday life
You have risen above all past limitations
You are free of all jealousy and are happy for the blessings of others
You naturally see all problems as small and easy to overcome
You learn valuable lessons from all your daily struggles
You are free of all negative emotional bondage that anyone or anything
ever had on you
You see all your daily challenges as well within your capabilities
You take every difficulty in stride and always keep your cool
You are resilient - Your daily trials give you wisdom,
strength and confidence
You work through every struggle with absolute faith that
everything will work out for you
You are a clear thinker and find solutions to problems quickly and easily
You are great at finding the silver lining in every dark cloud
In spite of your faults, you are happy to be you
It's easy for you to let go of negative emotions and happily move forward
Making your own mistakes has taught you how important it is to
forgive others for theirs
Through every setback, you can stay happy knowing that,
ultimately, you will succeed
Your mind is now free of all harsh critical judgment
No matter how much chaos there may be around you,
your thoughts are peaceful and calm
Through all of life's difficulties, you just smile and do your best
Out of every misfortune you see tremendous opportunity
Through your daily struggles, you become more in every way
When adversity threatens to steal your enthusiasm,
you remember : THIS TOO SHALL PASS!
You thoroughly enjoy the process of working through every challenge you face
As time goes on, you get greater and greater enjoyment out of life
Doing your best brings you tremendous peace of mind
Even though you strive to achieve more, you are grateful
for every good thing now in your life Happiness is your natural state of mind
You allow other people to be responsible for themselves
You always have time to enjoy the here and now
You are a very likeable person
You like people for who they are, not for who you want them to be
You are always content with doing your best
You can laugh at yourself You are always satisfied with doing your best
You bring out the goodness in other people
You are calm and at ease no matter where you are and no matter what you are doing You can focus on one thing at a time without distraction
You are grateful for every lesson you are given, no matter what shape it takes
You only allow positive thoughts and ideas into your mind now
You are open to doing new and different things
You appreciate even the littlest kindnesses that other people do
You base your value on what is in your heart, not what is in your wallet
You believe that everything you do, you can do better with a smile
You always have time for a good laugh
You believe that success is the peace of mind that comes from doing your best
You bring happiness and good cheer wherever you go
You can always find something to be glad about
You now see wonderful opportunities all around you
You can have fun doing almost anything
It is your choice to be happy or sad, and you choose to be happy
You deserve to be happy
You enjoy today's pleasures today
You can quickly find something to like about everyone you meet
You feel a sense of accomplishment after every job well done
You find pleasure in both giving and receiving
You learn from the past but you live completely in the present
No matter, what you remain optimistic about your promising future
You live each day with the wonder of a child
You make other people feel good about themselves
You spend more time thinking about what you do want than what you don't
You truly enjoy doing nice things for other people
You wake up excited and eager to greet each new day
You surround yourself now with happy, enthusiastic people
No matter how much or how little you have, you are grateful for all of it
It's easy for you to notice what is good/fun in almost every situation now
No matter what you are doing, you try to make it as enjoyable as possible
The love in your heart creates harmony in every area of your life

Born to Succeed!

2007-06-15T20:18:00.000+08:00

When loneliness and depression beat you down, remember, there is Someone to help you up. Don't accept the label "loser," because you were born to succeed!

by Janet Treadway

The PA cracked on and the principal began to speak in a raspy, serious and sorrowful tone: "I have a tragic incident to relate to you, and I want you all to listen and think about it. Sara Hughes, a sophomore here, committed suicide yesterday..."
Sara Hughes—the students sat quietly remembering or trying to remember her. Just last Friday some of the students had been listening to the radio and had heard Sara call in. Upon naming the top 10 hits in order, she had been awarded a pizza party for herself and 25 of her friends. But she had not giggled with excitement as most people did when they won. She simply told the DJ, "Thank you—but I don't have 25 friends." The DJ had tried to persuade her, but she protested, "No, really, I don't have any friends," and with a click she was off the line.
Only a week before she had been alive and now she was dead. Students shivered at the thought and turned their attention back to the scratchy voice of the principal: "Please look around you at your classmates. Is there anyone who is left out all the time, anyone who has no friends? Please tell your teacher if you know of anyone."
When I heard about this true story, it touched the very core of my being. Why? Because I have been down that road of loneliness myself and I am sure that many of you have too. But, thankfully, I chose to handle it in a different way. The fact is, many of us, young and old alike, may feel left out or that we do not fit in. But most of us get back up and get going again. What happened to Sara that she would take such a drastic action? How could she have dealt with this differently, and how could other students around her have helped her?

Before tattoo on body, tattoo on mind

It all starts with the mind and what we put into our minds about ourselves and others.
Once, walking through the twisted narrow streets of Hong Kong, a man came upon a tattoo studio. In the window were displayed samples of the tattoos available. There were anchors and flags and mermaids. But what struck him with force were three words that could be tattooed on one's flesh: "Born to lose."
He entered the shop in astonishment and, pointing to those words, asked, "Does anyone really have that terrible phrase, 'Born to lose,' tattooed on his body?" The Chinese tattoo artist replied, "Yes, sometimes." "But," the man said, "I just can't believe that anyone in his right mind would do that." The Chinese man simply tapped his forehead and said in broken English, "Before tattoo on body, tattoo on mind."
Be careful what you put in your mind. It's so easy to tattoo negative things about ourselves in our minds. We think, "I am a loser and no one likes me." Sara had tattooed in her mind that she was a loser, that she was not worthy to be loved and cared for by friends around her. Because of her own self-image she gave off signals to others that she would not be fun to hang around with, which caused Sara to isolate herself from others even more. Many of us from time to time sink low, and feel this way about ourselves, but we must get back up. Talk to someone who can encourage you like Charles Eliot's mother encouraged him when he was down.
Charles William Eliot (1834-1926), former president of Harvard University, had a birthmark on his face that bothered him greatly. As a young man, he was told that surgeons could do nothing to remove it. Someone described that moment as "the dark hour of his soul." Eliot's mother gave him this helpful advice: "My son, it is not possible for you to get rid of that hardship.... But, it is possible for you, with God's help, to grow a mind and soul so big that people will forget to look at your face."
Mind and soul—how do we develop those? By reaching out to others. A proverb says that a man who has many friends must show himself friendly. I remember when I first came to church at the age of 19, I was so painfully shy that I would stand next to the wall and not speak. Then one day my minister said, "Janet, you need to go around and speak to people. Just put out your hand and say hello." The first time I did it, I thought I was going to faint. But the more I did it, the easier it became. Now I can speak to just about anyone. My minister taught me a valuable lesson about getting my mind off self and onto others. By doing this, my shyness was cured.
God sets an outstanding example for all of us to follow in reaching out and helping others. Psalm 113:5-7 says, "Who is like the Lord our God, who dwells on high, who humbles Himself to behold the things that are in the heavens and in the earth? He raises the poor out of the dust, and lifts the needy out of the ash heap." It is so nice to know that when we get down and feel as though we are on an ash heap, God is there to reach down to help us.
With constant contact with God, He can live in us and give us the confidence we need to be outgoing and friendly. Sometimes flaws that are so big in our own eyes can be so small to others. A warm and friendly smile and being concerned for others causes people to lose sight of those flaws that seem so big to us. By focusing on others we can become healers.

Become a healer

What is a healer? Webster's Dictionary says a healer is one that heals or attempts to heal. A healer restores a person to wholeness. We should be in the business of healing.
Everyone wants to be loved. Why not look for those who may be hurting inside, like Sara? If only someone had taken the time to reach out and offer a hand of friendship, this tragic story might not have occurred. It takes so little time to show care for someone else. This act of love, of taking the time, can make a lifelong difference in another's life.
Being people-centered, instead of self-centered, can make our lives shine to others around us. Reaching out to others will also help turn our own depression (as well as others') into joy.

Words can kill

Not only can we be guilty of tattooing negative images about ourselves into our own minds, but we can also be responsible for tattooing a negative image onto another person. How? We do this by our hurtful words to others and about others. Have you ever heard the expression, "He's a loser"? It's an expression that is used freely today. Do you know how damaging these words can be? What kind of hurtful things have been said to you? How much did it hurt?
Does God look at anyone as a loser? No! It is His will for all to be sons of God in His Kingdom. Be a person who uses words that heal. Use words that build up and encourage, not tear down. Perhaps Sara had hurtful words said to her that caused her to withdraw, pull back and become a loner. Be a healer with your words. Proverbs 16:24 says, "Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the bones." Choose your words carefully and use them to build up and encourage.

Accept what God is doing in your life

We must accept and work with what God has given us. We may have freckles, red hair, be too short, too tall, too skinny, too fat, have a speech problem or anything else we don't like about ourselves. Sometimes we are just too hard on others and ourselves.
Look what one girl came to realize after struggling with being too short. Elizabeth Elliot, in her book Let Me Be a Woman, records the story of Gladys Aylward who was unable to accept the looks God had given her. Gladys explained that when she was young she had two great sorrows. One was that, while all her friends had beautiful golden hair, hers was black. The other was that, while her friends were still growing, she had stopped. She was about four feet ten inches tall. But when she moved to Shanghai, China, she immediately noticed something about the people. "Every single one of them," she said, "had black hair. And every one of them had stopped growing when I did." She was able to look to God and exclaim, "Lord God, You know what You're doing!"
Gladys accepted what God was doing in her life. Learn to have the total confidence that God knows what He is doing with you in your life—that you are called for a great purpose! Many things you go through are for a reason that will enable you one day to fulfill God's great plan for you.

Success summary

So how could the tragic story at the beginning of the article have had a different ending? Here is some sound advice:
Be careful what you tattoo on your mind and others. Remember, you are a special gift from God. Be careful not to discourage anyone by your words.
Be a healer. Reach out to others. Get your mind off self and onto others and their concerns, which will cause you to have many friends who will love you and appreciate you.
Accept what God is doing in your life. God can use what we think is negative about ourselves to serve Him in an even greater way.
If you feel like taking your life, or know someone who feels that way, get help! Talk to a minister or a trusted friend. But talk to someone. Never take it lightly when someone says that he or she wants to die. And certainly pour out your heart to God about it and ask Him to encourage you. No one should ever end up as Sara Hughes did.
You are not a loser. You were born to succeed! YU ..... www.ucg.org

Janet Treadway works in the home office of the United Church of God and enjoys writing for and working with young people.